strawberries_fantasy

2010-10-01T00:23:00.002+08:00

Hmm its has been so long once again im back to my blogging.
My life is so simplifed after marriage so i dont think there is anything to blogged about. ;)

sometimes to me marriage is really like love tomb.
Somehow i then realised , after giving birth to babies,. you dont stand anything in your husband heart. cause babies more impt.
Its not something bad. at least he cares for the lill 2.

But a wife is not difficult to take care isnt?
a lill bit of care and concern , love and a lill bit of sweet talk sometimes makes her day happy.
But do all husband do that to their wife ?
thei think after marrying . their wife will stay with them forever. But do you know why some wife ran away ? not because they are farkers.
because they longed for the romance that they missed . they used to have.
They longed for those days when their husband woo them , the sweetness the tenderness.

I must admit im still a lill girl a young lady who haven really been through much before i settled down. I must say settling down is not a bad thing for me. BUT I NEED attentions from my husband , i need all his care and concern and not by calling me "AH SIAO" , " GIRL"
seriously. i dont even get a simple i love you from his mouth. i dont get to hear him call me "Dear" , " darling" . i dont get sweet honey words from him . i dont get his care and concern cause all he did was because of children. he will asked about children and will not asked about me.

Yes he tried hard to give me wad i want EG going out with my dear sisters. But , this is then 2 different matter, cause comes to relation , other than farking , i need romance love. you understand ? i need some sweet loving smiles i need some , " are you okay ? " "dont be sad darling" and not , quarrel whenever i mention , all the more i dont need " SORRY" i need your tender . I REALLY NEED LOVE!

Why am i always the one to pick fights? Do you think i love this. Im not trying to do that i just want you to know and understand! i just hope that you can listen to me ? cant you ? NOT ANYMORE? is it just because we are married ? I NEED A LISTENING EARS. AND NOT" SORRY ITS MY FAULT"

AGAIN AND AGAIN! theres no one fault , why can we learn from the mistake and pick up to live better ? i want him to know wad im thinking i chose to tell him . BUT ENDED UP QUARRELS EACH TIME.
So i guessed i have to hide it all in my heart and let it sank down to the bottom which hurts and JUST keep to myself and no one else?
voicing out makes my tears rolled. ok ok.. im controlling , but WHY!?!?!? WHY does he so mind about i drink ? I DONT GET DRUNK AND I always stopped whenever i get high. cause i still have the responsibilities , did i ever failed to do my job as a mum ?
I believe my mother in law witness all these. each time i went out chilling yes drinking .. i dont come back doing funny stuffs, i dont go back walking zig zag. i DONT JUST K.O.
i still look after my babies. So wads now? drinking is a problem ? just because he dont drink ? i sound like an offender? i sound idiot letting him quarrel again and again ?

I dont wanna mean a fight! i just wish to have a listening ears whens theres problems arise. when i need to talk to , and not the moment i start up a topic. ITS NOTHING BUT JUST ENDLESS QUARRELS. AND ITS OVER STUPID THINGS! FARK LA.

okok! perhaps im just not important. perhap just a tool to fark , to make love , to give birth , to command his obeys , to be a slave. BUT not a wife.

OKOK! i know. I'll just farking shutup and get lost at this moment!
thanks all~

2010-08-25T00:34:00.002+08:00

im back to my blogging.
blogging with jtmall. lill precious , forum on hwz , babies , etc
yup occupy all my time.

and yes. this is my life revolving around money,love,and my family.

I dont know why today. could be my pms.
was so damn emo.
darling is not back yet from his "7mth qiak toh" and yes , once pms i feel lonely.
my back hurts . hurts like my spine is breaking.
my nose bleed , bleed like the water flows.
my mental is so tiring, tired till i feel like slping without worrying.
my menses cramp , cramp till i feel like doing nothing.
my poor lill boy's growing teeth, till he's having fever.
my girl yearns to carry , till no time to carry her always.
my pocket's hole, till i tried so hard to mend it back.

Im seriously so tight up in time and financial. i need like extra 5k? to ease my living ?
as for time, when i have the money . things will be so much easier.

But still, living with them , my life wouldnt be any easy.
Trying hard. trying hard to accomodate them,
trying hard , to resolve the heart problems i have with them.
trying hard , to understand how much my husband try to make my life easier.
trying hard to tell myself that living with them all , is just as good as living with mummy
trying real damn hard to treat them like my own.

Cause afterall , we need to live together for like the next 1-2years or even 3?

Tell me, my emo-ing is caused by PMS.
yar i yearn for more love at times, as i feel lonely or like slave to the family.
But they said " thats why a mother is great" .
so im trying to understand. I dont need to be great. I need and yearn for relaxation , for freedom , for more love just like other ladies ;)

but stil i understand. im a mother of 2. yup. okays. thats it. so just end the topic. ;)

Things will most prob be better,
even living with disguise.
Or facing the truth or facts.

2010-08-08T20:10:00.001+08:00

im like drained.

shagged.

tired.

I dont know. i mean i hope theres like peace ?
like harmony ?

a lill bit of more understanding, a lill bit of more care and concern, a lill bit more of loves.
Life would be great isnt ?

2010-07-26T23:23:00.002+08:00

Am back from KLgetaway trip with my 3 darlins and my dear.
Well ,its a trip we've planned long ago. but we finally went for this trip.
Yupx , theres many conflicts in between but , well , we enjoyed.

Especially the shopped and eat , drink and drunk.
LOL!
we should have like video everything and see how stupid are we when we are drunk ?
we had 4 jugs of beers, with 3 guiness , 2 monchito. ( i thnk spelling should be like tt la ) lol!
Was not totally drunk but damn high. haa! anyway we had our girls nights.

We shopped like as if , theres no tmr and as if its free. LOL esp lesly tan. the money in her pocket is so pathetic, THEY DONT STAY LONG! HAHA.

was like planning for another trip. But i dont know whether will it fufill the next time round.
Cause this planning takes up quite a lot time before we really went for it.
But i promise I'll save to make the next dream fufill. ; )

TAIWAN ? BANGKOK ? HONGKONG? ;)

Money money money please roll in!
I love you darlings! yupx. i hope we had fun for this trip!!

P.S LEE darling. sorry for that night for making you slp alone and all the big fuss, lucky you understand ; ) thank you although your attitude towards me sucks like shit! LOL. THANK YOU AND LOVES YOU! AND please! i want a lil bit more of love and care. and im not just a woman in your life who gives birth and tk babies for you. PLEASE LOVE ME MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE , AND TREASURE ME !! IF NOT I'LL SLAP YOU , LIKE WAD OUR CONTRACT LIST!

Photos will post in FB.
If i have time, i'll post the pic in multiply ;)

2010-07-16T22:09:00.002+08:00

WOW.
im so freaking busy that i can hardly blogged on my blogg , or even the lill darlings one.

Had been dealing with suppliers and customers and all the other new catalouges !
Biz was not bad but im ot earning anything!
As i earn and I spent! oh my god! im freaking a online shopper! LOL.
PLEASE HELP ME!

I bought baby girl's clothes , skirt etc butnot boy's perhaps I'll save and buy better oes in KL.
Kl trip with sisters and darling with his brother next saturday.

baby boy and girl has been sick for like the past 1 month. They are taking their turns! im so sick and tired! and tried to hard to separate them with their cousins. BUT!
If theres only my side of prevention , theres no use! i prevent they come nearer I prevent the com closer! oh god please tell me, any other better way to remind them of their unconsideration ? They dont give a damn but , the medicals fess are making me crazy! the weakness of the two lill precious is hurting me.

CANT THEY JUST DO THEIR PART AS WAD THEY SHOULD.
THEIR ROLES OF RESPONSIBILITIES IN THEIR LIFE ?
SICK, just dont come any closer to babies. Dont they know their immune systems are not strong yet ? CHILDREN SICK just prevent them from coming nearer la! URGH* making me so pissed!

Baby girl, is having rashes all over her body! is like making her face swollen. see-ing her like this hurts me. like so itchy yet she cannot voice out. IM NOT HOPING MUCH. I JUST HOPE THAT ALL PARENTS WILL DO THEIR JOBS AS WAD THEY SHOULD.

i dont believe their new baby girl's out , when their sons got sick , they will allow them to cough on the girl's face , to sneeze at the girl's face. So unfair isnt ?
Just do something ab0out it la? HAIS.

THATS the problem with living with in laws , as well as A BIG FAMILY!
the wrost is MIL can say , " aiyah , not so easy pass virus one la" fark la! and now she see? does she? its passing ard the house~ the house is like staying 12 people? and its taking turns. adults is alrights, but babies cannot stand it ! ahhh im going crazy at tthis topic. i just feel like drinking and get away from the house whenever i think of it. BUT I HAD THOSE 2 WITH ME! I STILL HAVE MY LOVED ONES.

I CANNOT THIS THIS PLACE.
i hope as a daddy, he can do something for his lill two precious. if not they aint getting any stronger! if not they will be sick through out by having the virus passing around.
Im trying real hard that i even got masks. even if MIL laughing , i dont give a damn anymore, you can laugh but pls dont pass any of your sickness to my precious PLEASE!
THEY CANNOT EVEN THINK!!!!

I really need a break. but im so worried. this is making me CRAZYY!!!!

2010-06-02T12:44:00.003+08:00

Its our first year wedding anniversary on 31st May 2010.

And thinking back this is the first time Ive spent 1 yr with my partner.

This time round , i had two lill darlings with me. Yar , its indeed so different.

I dont talk about breakups , heartbroke , crying in the middle because of bf leaves me etc.

I talk about commitments, true loves , care and concern from my lifetime partner.

haa.

We ended up in kushinbon at great world city , seriously service and food over der are great. I just love them so much. Perhaps compared to jurong and suntec branches , this is the best. ; )

We had our romantic ? dinner? hhaaa!

And then headed home. Wanted to go out , but at that point of time there isnt anywhere for us to go , somemore its a monday.

Anyway i receieved love on tt day. eh yes, just on tt particular day. I FELT love you know? haha! he pampered me. ehh YAR ONLY ON TT DAY I MUST EMPHASIZE.

I received a poh heng hello kitty series from him. which was a real suprised to me . Cause i dont wanna him to spent on other stuff as we are quite financially tight. And yet , he got me tt. Im happy really . Ive wanted it . But i know its out of our budget. So Ive drop the idea. ;)

But it would have been better if he got the one with pink ruby! HAHHAHAH! just kidding la.

Anyway darling , these 1 years , is really challenging to me. Feeding babies , taking care of them , the cries in the midnight , had been the first time for me being a mother and a wife. Despite all these , although at times u are a BIG bully , and im unreasonable , but you forgive and still loves me. I must say , yes , i know there isnt any 100% perfect man. But you are the 50% of me. ; ) I will try to be 50% too to be your another 100% . I'll try! haha! Love you. happy 1 year anniversay ...

2010-05-25T23:58:00.002+08:00

They had made a farking big fuss. im so farking pissed off.
I jus hope im out of here.
This is still hell.
I dare not tell it face to face to him .
He is in between. I hope things are well for him and HIS family but not me pls.

Just leave it the way this is. Im leaving in my own space. I have my everything. I love my small lill family. my husband. my babies or even the maid.

This is too big for me to torlerate. and i promise i will never complain abt this. JUST DONT DO THINGS TT WILL MAKE ME COMPLAINS. I HOPE HE WILL NOT SUFFER. I JUST WANT HIM TO HAPPY.

went out with sh and hongqing. yes feeling much better. With darling always by my side im always blissed. yes i love you darling . no sweet talks no romance , but love from my heart.
Im happy with my friends , how should i say it , -HEAVEN . back to home? HAA. i should not spell it out.

In case some KPOs spy on my blog and cause his family apart. I do not wish he and his family fall apart. I know how important a family is. just like mine. my mummy and me, my two darlings and my hubby. So i do not want to . Im not stranger , neither am i a good daughter in law i know. Im just trying to make peace.

Im torlerating. im v v angry. but i cannot expressed my self out. But seeing him doing so much for this. It hurts me. It makes me feel i should be more mature and face this instead of running away. I should protect those who are impt to me instead of those not.

anyway. I had my leaves. i had enjoyed. So shall be it ; )
Thank you so much! loves!

2010-05-24T23:13:00.001+08:00

I just need a lill bit more love , a lill bit more concern and a lill bit more care.

Yet Ive realised I have none.
All i have is to accept the life tt im married. And my life has been taking for granted just because we are man and wife. How i wish life could be back to times when we are always in courting relations. So that i have a lill bit of everything more than now.

I sincerely treasure your each and single words of " i love you " and " thank you dear " But I have hear none of these just because our status has changed to "MARRIED" .

2010-05-18T16:47:00.002+08:00

Am back from JB/KL mlysia trip.
this is really a bonus trip.

I do not expect i will be able to go KL. cause there's on and off arguements.
And i know he dont wish to go oversea , because of financial wise.

BUT!

We still went. We went to JB first cause his buddies are busy still. Den we drove in first . Yes. we spent around $100. in JB including the "tap and go" card , our dinner etc.

We had our dinner at holiday plaze "cha chan ting"

.

After dinner he decided to go to KL instead of staying in JB. We bought a ticket at larkin station. And then aboard on bus at 12am. Before that we went back home to park his car , and took a bus in instead. see how happy i am? HAHAH. im looking and longing so much for this getaway trip.

So we reached KL at around 430am , and took a cab form the station to Times square. i mean OPP time square. lol - the star Inn hotel. hmm it was just a hotel, with one tv , one batheroom , one cupboard , and just like when you kill someone and you need a SIMPLE hotel to stay in. " thats wad he say " lol! slept till 1130 plus, and cam whoring , to remember that we had been to KL.

this is the hotel.

Early in the afternoon , we went to opp Times square to shop.
and had our lunch ? - at the chicken rice shop.

... had this for $17.00 for 2 person. EXP hor!

... the indoor amusement park. because of budget we did not spent the money playing.

.., after the 3-4 hrs shopping at time square , i camwhore with my new sunglasses! haha and he ...

.. with his "FENG YUN 2" SWORDS.
well, thats wad guys/ fav.

.. see hoe childish is he ? LOL!

.. these causes SGD200 plus. HAHA.hidden "treasures"

Shagg after one whole day , we had our dinner at the 24 hr street , opp our hotel.

.. stingray,egg , sotong , BEER! etc causes SGD$30plus.

Den back to our hotel and the next day. ...

... we end the 1 day trip at KL . ;) BACK TO SGP.

Yes. my short short last min getaway trip. though its just KL. but im happy. happy for the moments. ;) loves!

2010-05-14T11:39:00.003+08:00

im back home because it is his bday today.

was longing for a trip to mlysia. but he's longing for a sleep instead.
I tried so hard to plann so much for him , even his presents and stuff. but seriously,
is a couple tgt for long , I MEAN WE ARE ONLY TGT FOR 1 YR!
saying loving you or thank you is not needed ?

I need. i need the " love you " i need the " thank you" to know im loved and the appreciation I did. but nevertheless, i had nth. i mean ,. sorry i do not have much money to buy you gucci wallet , to buy you your soccer jersey , to but you wadever you want.. i know as a wife im useless.
But telling me that you appreciate , is also meaningless?

I dont know how much i stand in your heart , or not even anymore. or babies overcome and stand everything in ur heart ?

I understand you are tired from your work , and blogging this is just another " not happy" blog towards you , you might think. But wad can i do to express out wad im not happy or dissapointed with ? With me by your side , telling you , " i love you " each time , wads your reaction ?

"yar yar , ok "

I dont know should i feel regrets. but i know now when im not happy , or sad , theres two to be by my side other then you. or even my friends. i want to tear , i want to shout , but who can i do it to ?? under blanket ? or behind the doors ? BY MYSELF? or with you by my side?
Who say its a blessing to get married with a hubby and children ? there many stories behind e door. ;)

can someone tell me , who is closer to you ? your partner , ur friends ? or your family ?
so near yet so far. i feel empty even with you by my side... ; '(

lastly , i dont know wad to do , : happy bday darling :

2010-05-01T12:58:00.002+08:00

Today is the first day of may.

Haa. i enjoyed myself yesterday night . Well although i REALISED i have a husband who dont care much about his wife and can left her waiting at another place while he can sleep at home. Im seriously angry about this. It makes me feel im so not important. Lucky i have my buddy with me. if not, i cannot imagine i'll be waiting alone for hours but to no ava? Tts stupid. i HATE HIME FOR BEING LIKE THIS. but im somehow used to it.

I think sooner or later I'll might dont even give a damn about this. Which i hate this. Cause i scare sooner or later i will dont give a damn about him or rather this relationship. Yes i will . and i do.

Thats why couples always end up relationship turn sour because of not being honest to each other or perhaps too used to each other. As for me , i know as long as the moment you made me feel i should not give a damn about you , THAT IT. yes even we have children. i mean kids might be on top piority but not YOU. ;)

Thats why at times im always reminding him please love me more and dont treat me as rubbish . I cannot imagine when he promise to fetch me and ended up sleeping , the moment he wake up . will he remember that he had left his wife somewhere out der waiting ?

THIS IS JUST A SOONER OR LATER. SOMETIMES I FEEL EMPTY BEING WITH HIM. i enjoy my life yesterday with zhengfu. yes my 8-9 yrs buddy. And i love my batch of sisters. i mean no matter wad , they will be in the first place of mine. Cause i love them all seriously. they are always der holding me when i was about to fall and not your partner.

Im angry, yes very angry and indeed dissapointment. But im also happy , cause i know if he sees me being happy and drunk , they will be quarrels. But i just cannot imagine HE WOULD HAVE LEFT HIS WIFE OUT DER WAITING WITHOUT REMEMBERING! WADS PROMISE? HAHA.
ai yar. tts a joke la. i mean I'll just .... forget it?

I remember my friends , and my buddys , that i have. smiling . pub life is still fun. so wad am i a mother? ;) i love to mixed with people... but being drunk is still horrible. LOL. im having a gathering soon on my lovely sis bday soon!

MAY is a hectic month. i think I'll drop all suprises for him. and bother more on my flea market with darling les rather then thinking of how to celebrate his bday and the 1 yr wedding anni.
At times he really forces me to do things thats not on my mind.

2010-04-30T01:02:00.002+08:00

Puppet - quiet & controlled.

HUSBAND AND WIFE QUARRELLED BECAUSE OF MJ AND $150.
That's joke of the day ? ;)

I want it END.

I did the thing i never did in my life.
yes. First time in my life I will never forget and makes me so sad and dissapointed.
Maybe i failed myself being a wife .

Im a lousy one.
I think i need some enrichment classes on " HOW TO BE A GOOD WIFE" to satisfy him.
Satisfy a man whose temper is lousy like shit and i had to compromise with a person who will never change of his shit temper.
His aunt told me , " he is so much better now , he used to be wrost, "
YAR ? SOO WTF ? I DONT USED TO BE THE ONE GIVING AND SRY ALL THE TIME. when i dont think im wrong. WHY MUST I BE LIKE THIS? where is the speak up joanne ? where is the noisy one ? Used to be better , does tt mean he will be more better? or will he be the wrost?!

IM SO SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THIS.
I JUST WANT TO BE QUIET. YET ...

sometimes im thinking humans are fragile. really fragile.
People can spend so much time trying to live with something better , but accidents are casuing their strong determinations to end. Within seconds , some might just pass away.
Some can just pass away with brain dead. This is so fragile.
I mean , treasure the ones u love. really , everyday , every single moments.
I really wonder. If you dont start to treasure , will you regret one day ?

Im back to my place, yes my pretty lill home sweet home.

2010-04-26T00:21:00.004+08:00

This is the 514th post Ive blogged since I was in Secondary 1 ? ; )

I realised as we grow , we tend to change according to what we have , I realised I blogged more to the babies' site rather then here.
Perhaps once we have our own babies, our EVERYTHING BELONGS to them. and i know how it feels. It feels like ... what you are doing are alr not only you , but about him and them . you know wad i mean? I cannot be as playful as I am.

I mean wad ever you are going to do , you need to know who are you going to report to and what will the consequences be. EG going out with friends. It not just about going out anymore. Its about how you going to manage your time and arrange it in a way you wont neglect your friends as well as your small lill family. And i definately have troubles managing my time. But thanks to darling for helping me out each time i feel like going out. I MEAN YES I ADMIT IM RELYING SO MUCH ON HIM ; )

Thats why certain times , i understand wad kind of situation i am in, and i will reject wad i am not suppose to do.

Anyway two lill ones turing 5 mth old tmr! 26th April. Time flies isnt? thinking back 5 mths ago i was preg with big stomach , so heavy and see the two small lill ones being "taken out" from my womb. haa! and now they are growing like oe of them is alr 8.2kg the other 7.9kg. can you guess, who is 8.2 kg ? ; )

I mean this is wad , its not all just about myself ? ; )

I love my small lill family. of course including my own mother , my uncle and my brother ! ; ) hearts!

2010-04-19T18:30:00.002+08:00

Its raining so heavily now.
And i had 1 day of two people world.
YAR ,who say married life and after having babies dont have a two people world ?
haha . I have. at least a short one still.

17th April
Wanted to meet up with abby and ming ji initially out to chill, but think they have some problems, cancelled.

So in the end we still have our two people world.

CAMWHORING while preparing to go out.
YAYA. my silly head looks v silly. But at least he say i look younger la!
Anyway dont know is true or not. just be it. Just for fun la. try try new head! haa!

And yar , we had our dinner STEAMBOAT at bugis.
The spicy chicken. OH yar their supper sucks la. soup no taste.
But its going at SGD$13.50 only. NO CHOICE.

YAR , THE CHILLI.

This is the Man who peel the Small lill prawn for me. haha
Acting gentle man.

And dadah. the lill prawn.

To the cathay , And watched the 2.50am - MONGA.
While waiting.

The final chapter , this will going to be my next show , folle by IP MAN2.

While waiting for 2.50am...

We leave our prints here....

Although its a short day , but at least i enjoyed partially. cause got to rush home look after babies still. haa haa!

2010-04-15T17:47:00.002+08:00

Raining season ?

These few days raining so heavy and the thunder always scare my baby boy.
He fell asleep and it wake him up.
Poor boy.

Baby grow up fast. so fast.
Life these few days so scary. his whole family sick and darling is sick.
PLEASE ! EVERTHING PLEASE GO BACK TO NORMAL.
TIRED! TIRED OF wanting to keep the sickly away from babies , be it adults or kids. they wants to go near , and kiss them when they are carrying virus. HELLO, my babie immunity not as strong as a 2-3 yrs old kid. cant they just be understanding ? SO SELFISH.

If my babies got sick, im gonna be v tiring, cause it will be a one after one thing. and the wrost thing is i will be the one suffering too. cant i be selfish a bit ? and cant they be more responsible and understanding?

darling stand by me these few days. i dont know wad makes him so nice and sweet ?
I measn well he helps me, helps me make the boy slp feed him , change his diapers, instead of throwing everything to me like wad he used to did. or throw to his mum and he ? SLEEP.
But nowadays , he helped out. haa! im happy of course.
I mean i can see he's trying so hard so hard to juggle b/t his wrk , slp , babies and me . lol
despite all my naggings, but still , seeing him like this , makes me feel ease and happy la. ;)

Thank you darling. i love you.
yearning for the short mlysia trip ? hees!
Muacks!

2010-04-06T00:39:00.001+08:00

DAUGHTER IN LAW CAN NEVER OR NOT ABLE TO COMMUNICATE WITH MOTHER IN LAW :)

YAR. CAN NEVER.

I love my hubby. my two lill sweetie pies too.
thats all.
no one in this family is reasonable.
erms , yar. all unreasonable . :)
RIDICULOUS FAMILY.

2010-03-31T22:52:00.002+08:00

this is the 511th post.
Well , time flies. and yes. it flies.
Since the day i went secondary school and been through all the past relationship had been recoded in those past entries. Reading back i feel , yar , life is changing day after day.

Having so bad backache. so regret not doig my confinement properly.
FULL OF REGRETS!
HAIS. i should have ... do it at my own home. haa!
ANYWAY ITS OVER. I CAN ONLY SUFFER.

And baby jiajun is teething. so tiring. carrying and more saynags needed.
AND THE MIL IS spoiling him by carrying him in the way to see things which makes hand ache.
Well , she claim she used to it. SO WAD? does tt mean all must follow the way she does and ache like she did ? stupid. and will the maid be willing to carry her in such a way or will she be free to carry one after another in such a way if they are used to it. SO STUPID TO SAY those thing and so stubborn to want things to go her way. Well , i know , she's experience , so wad? does that mean ALL other who have babies got to guide and teach them in a way that she spoilt them ? so stupid.
I wanted to talk back. i just cannot take it and fark care . but SHE'S MY HUSBAND MOTHER. HELLO. this is stupid la. i mean , my child i DONT WANT CARRY AND SPOILT THE GIRL IN SUCH WAY, WAD CAN SHE DO ? AND she spoilt my boy. i REGRETS letting her do the way she wants to MY CHILDREN. yar. grandparents, have the right but not the total control.

ANOTHER TIME I WILL BE SARCASTIC. Sorry to my hubby then. I dont think why i should make my life so difficult. : ) and that why i dont like to bring them down to the in law when im alone.
To hear nonsense and to see the way they treat them when i dont like , thats like , suffering and torturing to me. HAA.

Anyway , apologise to darling Lee. : )

Updated babys' blog. : ) http://lill-precious.blogspot.com

2010-03-29T13:40:00.002+08:00

So naive to think i have a fairy tale ending just like the prince and princess ending.

And as time pass by , i realised every thing has a turning point, everything has a climax. Just like when we watched movie , or television, theres always a turning point to touched or to make the show interesting .

And yes. This is my turning point.

It starts with the girl married happily to the man she loves. because of the babies they've got. Show goes smoothly and things happened naturally. And so here's the climax where life turns and changed. freedom trapped and captured. Quarrels and Fights occur when theres arguments. Well , you may find it so normal as it happens i every climax of a show. those , quarrels fights quarrel fights.

And it makes the girl tired. fight , quarrels , no understanding from the rest , demanding from others, lost of freedom , problems with staying, financial, insuffient slp , babies and stuffs. Who can she complained to ? who can she blame? : ) no one.

This is life. Its just like the show you often watch. Ups and Downs.
No one to blame when theres no one der for you. No one to blame when own freedom is trapped, no one to blame when they cannot understand you, no one to blame when you have financial tight.
All comes form a reason. And yes. There's a reason. TO EVERYTHING.

But its different from show. It has no ending . But she hopes and wish for a fairy tale one. The one the prince loves the princess and they live happily ever after. The one she sees others with their own lill family of 4 , smiling and staying together. though tough , but she yearns for. : )

what kind of life .you yearn for , you got to work for it. and so,
This is life. :)

2010-03-17T22:40:00.002+08:00

AlrightS!
Im so filled with regrets now ...

I;ve missed the 2nd prize again! as well as starter.
If i had known . i should buy them!! ahhhhh!
Baby jiajun shit on me today.
And well , they say shit is gold. If i had known and rem, i should have buy my own bday!!
And there goes my 1k. ahhh! omg! HAIIS.
no money alr. and baby jiajun wanna give me some income , and yet i give it a miss! so stupid!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! stupid!

how stupid can i be.

Anyway baby jiajun and baby jiaying has their own grown up blogg.
Its cretaed for them to see how they grow up.
And yes , its
http://lill-precious.blogspot.com
Click der to see their updates pictures :)

and lastly to all married guys out der!
As a married woman and mother of two , i dont think married life should just stayed home and look after the children.
As a mother , they still have their own freedom and rights for themselves.
I dont think why they cant go out and relax or meet the opp sex.
Its not as if they are not trustable.
HELLO. we are alr married and babies are born , wads with the " no trust" so stupid.
AND yar , how many guys out der will like a woman with 2 babies or children and married.
Not many. but yar , der is still.
And i dont see why married woman cannot go pub to relax?
I think the most important is honesty. I think as long as one is honest enough to their partner , i dont see wads the problem.
And wouldnt it be WROST IF ONE LIEED JUST TO GO OUT WITH OPP SEX OR JUST OUT TO RELAX?

Tts the problem i have always wonder ?
To lie or Not to Lie.
So how many of you out der love to be lied ?

this is farkin irony isnt?

2010-03-15T00:54:00.002+08:00

YOU KNOW WAD?! I JUST CANT BELIEVE.
TT IDIOT OF MINE , PLAYED THE RING THING AND STUFF.
and ... 2 more lill boys to go.

Think back of it. its quite scary. I mean. been through once, there going to be 2 more times?
Im so scare. I mean... well , no one understand. haa!

Anyway brought the two lill ones to united square.
First time really just go shopping and walk walk .
Well , there's sure one of them to be the noisy one. and today is the boy. haa.
Think his teeth is making him uncomfortable. that his saliva drips and wet his wholeeee tee shirt. hes not comfortable and kept crying. the lill girl smile smile and smile ... =)
So sweet of them . yupz. they are my precious.

And they are growing ...
I just see them grow each day passes .
the girl's cry each night and my night just filled with her cries.
and so ... there goes my sleep. haahaa!
help me. boy's down with flu. his nose kept running. help me ctach it back ? and make him better ?

Just cant wait for them to grow ... =D
loves.

oh ya! i wish the best for my buddies and friends out der!

2010-03-11T00:04:00.003+08:00

Im so pissed. so farked up. so irritated.

NAGGINGS , IRRITATINGS , CRYINGS , AND STUFFS.
Sometimes some people just dont know how to automatic and thought the whole world lives the way they do. Well im not trying to be difficult to live with. but just stop being so irritating in my life la. Sometimes , they think the way they do is right , doesnt mean everyone has to live the way they live in right ? come'on tts making me feel ... I'll shut up.

This isnt wad i want, isnt the life im craving for.

As for the two lill ones . they are getting slightly better. But the girl just cant to slp at night. and she;s an alarm to daddy! =D she wakes daddy up every 730 AM. went to KK to have her check up again. She cries non stop at night , and in the morning, making me doing crazy. Yar. i know this isnt wad she wants to. she dont wish to have a nose like tt too. Tts why im trying to make myself calm each time she cries. no matter how tired i am. But eventually i breakdown this morning. Her crying and milking in the midnight , makes me , " dont know wad to do" and each time she crys, some pple will keep asking . " wad happened to her. HOW THE FARK I KNOW WAD HAPPENED? IF I KNOW I WILL JUST TACKLE THE PROBLEM RIGHT?

Just want to ask the obvious.
Rubbishs.

Well, Once again , i'll just shut up my mouth. cause i had no capability to keep the two up for the moment.

And darling took childcare leave today just because i breakdown today and tell him i do not want to be home alone. YAR. it sucks.
Thank you to him , that today my life is so much better despite the lill darling crying non-stop.
i must really say .thank you darling. i love you.
And thanks to wati , the maid , she take care her all day long. I must admit its my fault in the first place, that i throw her to the maid too. tt she;s used to the way the maid carry to sleep. and at nigth if she cant slp , i had no ways to carry her using the sarong that wati's using.

Who to blame? ME, myself.
If only i can handle both of them , YES. MY way of living. well , yar, im selfish. =D
Cause since born , i do not have much sayings. no rights.
So ... where's my rights?

and tt farking cb saying im complaining. FARK HIM NOW!
stop being so KPO CAN ?
SHUT UP! THIS IS NOT COMPLAINING!
THIS IS JUST TO SAY OUT WAD I WANT TO FEEL CAN A NOT U CB!
AND I WILL BOLD THIS LA!!
HAHAHAHA!

2010-03-09T16:50:00.003+08:00

i had my night out ytd with my sisters.
Although it is a vvery short while , but still , enjoyed! =D

Baby ying and baby jun are both SICK. yar. medical fees up to 100++
but still no choices , their sickness are contagious to both of them.
and well , thats twins. if you dont tk properly.

no pple at home to look after , so afterall i had to rush back home to take over darling's place.
And a very big thank you to darling . if not enough , plus a hug to him.
Well , i must thank him for looking after the two lill ones.
if not i dont think i can chill out with my sisters. =D
love you darling!

2010-03-04T23:46:00.002+08:00

talking to jane now , about mothers experiences.
so funny. and i think natural birth is SCARY. i mean even till now. eeek . i think i dont want to go tru that . lols . i had better guai guai scheldue my birth and have them out. lol. i cannot stand the process of water bag burst , and contractions and stuffs. that's scary! haa.

wonder hows sh's now. her childish hubby? they way how much she loves him ? how she is handling eden and stuffs? hopes things are going smoothly for her .

baby jia ying's sick. her phlgem is making her difficulty in breathing . her cough and her flu. poor jiay ing. i dont know how to help her.bought her to doc , to got her phlgem sucked out. LOUSY daddy said dont suck finsih cause she's crying out loud. BUT THE PROB is not finish sucking , now she's suffering... i know the night is going to be tough on her as well as ME. haha she wont be able to slp and i know i cant too . but its okay la. as long as she can sleep a while , i dont mind carrying her to slp. poor thing la..

Daddy got childcare sick leave , but to TEND SHOP AND not acc-ing us =(
i dont like this, his parents always take him for granted. i promises once i got money , i will moved out and have our own family instead of like keep summon for my darling. i mean , he's married not tt mummy boy anymore. need not stays by ur side forever. right? i will still allow him to be back certain days to help in his family , after all its his father and mother. but not everyday or even times when he take MC, and they take him for granted ? wads this? then hire labour la. not possible to ask him help out each time he take mc or leave ma. then wad about us ? me , jia ying and jia jun ? i mean , if she's gonna be like tt , i believe she is selfish. I ADMIT I AM! but because they had taken my hubby for granted. TOO MUCH.

LEE YONG SHEN IS A MARRIED MAN OKAY . NOT MUMMY BOY!!!! =(
he has his own family la! fark. I KNOW AND ADMIT IM NT A GOOD DIL. I KNOW IM FAKING.
SO ? im faking , so i can try and learn to be good. for the sake of him. who loves to stays with in laws after all.

2010-02-26T15:51:00.002+08:00

CNY ends so fast.
This sunday is the last day of CNY.

And i had spent my CNY with my most precious ones.
My 3 darlings , my sisters as well as my families.
As part of his family , CNY for them is a v busy dayss. they had activities throughout till the 8th of CNY.

Had met up with my sisters to chill out on and off during the CNY. be it because of happy occasions or sad , i enjoy being with them. Cause they are my dearest ones.

As for my two darlings, they had their injections on the 22nd of feb. they had 3 jabs. and the 3 jabs causes us 1k plus. it was like ... WTF! lol . but no choice. this is just to protect them . AND THE WROST THING IS. we were given 2 sets of numbers. we HAD the numbers! yet we forget to buy !!!! AND it came up 1st and 2nd during the last weekend ! FARK SIA. HAIIIIS. money just flyyy. lol! But anyway back to topic , baby jiajun was dwn with fever right after the injections. and frm tt day ownwards, his stomach get weak. tends to cry often. perhaps the jab scares him. poor jiajun. As for baby jiaying, NO DIFF to her , she's still smiling off after the 2 injections and one med. If the files are not big , i might upload the videos and pictures.

the whole house is in a mess! one of the maid had to fly back home because of her husband running away with her girl. she had to fly back IMMEDIATELY. therefore the house was left with only one maid. WHICH I CAN PREDICT my next week , will be a crazy week !

Might or might not be meeting my dearest on mon. i scare due to no pple take care. but anyway hoping to see them soon. =)

their First year angbaos.

the prince and the princess.

I had my chill out with them.
my darlings. and picture with siru also.

My baby girl - jiaying. HAPPY NEW YEAR.

And my poor boy down with fever after the injection. haha.

2010-02-21T01:50:00.002+08:00

happy new year.

Ive spent the first new year with my two lill darlings.
Day by day they've grown up. Day by day , they are older. i love them , so much =)

And this MIL of mine is freaking funny. When i say i help to look after the boy , she say , " you tonight dont want to slp with me ah ? " sound so pathetic. and now FIL say , " since you all no work , help to see the babies leh , so tired"
Im rather pissed when i hear tt. I know they are freaking tired. tts why i wanted to look after . then ONCE AGAIN DONT GIVE ME THOSE KIND OF COMMENTS. PISS ME OFF.

i dont like to hear pple say all those rubbishs. sound as if my babies are troublesome and irritating CB. THEY ARE MY DEAR ONES. no one can harm them. INCLUDING TT HUBBY OF MINE.
anyone bully either one of them , HELL they go. i can just fark and curse !!

I miss mummy. i miss home. it has been 2 weeks. wonder how is she. =) mummy, not forgetting you. i love you.

loves. and hearts !

I update babies pictures soon. AND LAPTOP GONE CASE. IT WENT TO OPERATION. BACK IN 5-6 DAYS.

2010-02-13T22:31:00.003+08:00

13th feb.

2 more hours to 2010 chinese new year. as well as 2010 valentine day!
I've spent 2 new year and 2 valentine with darling. and there's endless to count. =)

Althought this valentine , im so budget to buy presents for him, all i can do is to let him know i love him as much as he love me.. Darling , happy new year ! and we've spent another valentine tgt! sorry i could not buy you anything you want. but I'll work extra hard to give you better suprise. =)
Thank you for all your love and care that you've shower me with . I LOVE YOU. SO MUCH AS YOU LOVE ME. HUGs and KISSes.

Happy new year to all my dear friends out der! I LOVE YOU guys too.

Oh yar. Went chinatown yesterday to walk walk.
and i saw this cute icon!! so cute!! =D its 3d!
and yes . they are my cow darlings. haha
and this new year darlings are both 2.5 mths old.
darling boy start to turn, and girl , start to talk. haha so funny.

The two precious babies. =D

2010-02-12T21:18:00.002+08:00

To put a smile on my face is just like faking it .

New year is here. yet im not anticipating it. neither i look forward to it.
The only reasons i could make myself to look forward is , baby will be older . grow uup fast pls.

Somehow i feel that my life is written and set properly once i got married.
Ladies out der! please do consider the factors before you want to settle down.
FACTORS.

im yearning for freedom. YES. YEARNING SO MUCH . just like the bird in the sky , flying happily. They may encounter some problems , but what can i say ? tts life. the only good thing is, they are flying happily in the wide wide sky.
- THE WIDE WIDE SKY ...

2010 new year. IS JUST ANOTHER NEW YEAR. =)

mummy. may you stay happy forever.
ahboy, may you grow up and not go into so many debts. haha

My dear sisters , may all your path goes smoothly and best wishes in wadever you sis do.

My dear friends out der , wish you all a happy new year. a new year , new beginning for all the singles. take care friends!

2010-02-08T00:09:00.002+08:00

我以为 - 品冠
我爱他 - 丁当

these come from 下一站，幸福.
and this is really nice. so touching.

Well , people will say , TW dramas , " yucks" , " i dont like vananess", " not nice loh" But still seriously, even i dont like vananess , but xiao xiao bin is really cute. in that drama . a lill boy so 懂事。touching, sweet , and sad. The way the mother teach the kid is so ... how much i hope my darlings will be like tt too. AND NOT SPOILT BY IN LAWS. FARK . I will have my ways to bring my OWN CHILDREN. thank you so much.

Had my reunion dinner with my families members. But its not nice and yet expensive. haha. SO WASTED =( Darling paid for this meal , treatign mummy too. although uncle steve is not there, perhaps find another better day to treat him since tt 4d strike . but seriously this kind of dishes costs us 200$ for 5 person. is NOT nice.

Sometimes i tell myself ,"I want to be a better person" I want to be more forgiving. I want to be more independent. " i want to accept all help given" But I CANT. Im trying. i promise. give me some time and i will be a better person.

And of cause treatig him better then expected la. if not all i got is just complains that im not loving enough.

New year is coming. COUNTING DOWN ...

2010-01-28T11:43:00.006+08:00

SUMMARY OF MY BDAY CELEBRATIONS

Well, it was a simple yet I've enjoyed my 22th bdays with just those loved onesss.

I should say as time passed , i wouldnt want to expect any suprised but a simple dinner with all the love ones and chill out tgt.

Mon , 25th met up with terry , sharon , sky and his buddy to JT-pub. well , it was my first visit and it had been so long since I've met up with them. love them to bits. Although it was my first time seeing sharon , but still i love her! haa. the cake at 12am was quite a suprised to me. Perhaps im a bit high and den suddenly theres just a cake. a small simple cake yet it makes me so happy. thanks to my 8 years buddies still ! i love you guys.

Tue , 26th Darling took half day off and came back to suprised me with a hello kitty cake when Im out of shower , he hide in the room with lighted hello kitty cake , oh yar! with his birthday song! haa. yar a simple one , with my most loved. I should say i love him , and the cake . AND of cause not forgetting my 2 lill darlings. it was their 2 mth old celebrations too! and yar! they are alr 2 mth old. times flies. i believe it will soon be 2 yrs old. =D i treasure and love. them , ALL. Night , mummy come and bring to to GREAT WORLD CITY -kushinbo. It was delicious and i love the food to bits. i love her , yes my mummy. specially come dwn frm wdls for my bday dinner. =D muacks!

Wed, 27th Arranged to meet up with my 8 years sisters for a dinner at resturant. Wanted to choose a high class resturant . but all was down with budget. so i reserved al dente at esplande. IT WAS A DISAPOINTING RESTURANT WITH DISSAPOINTIN SERVICE WHICH COST $260+. AI yar , it was a lousy resturant. But still , somehow enjoy the accompanied of the sisters. Jess , les , Sh , Ying , Siru, its enough to have them always there. We ended our dinner asap and out of tt place , and went to KRUGERS at neil road. Well , it was quite cosy with smoking area and drinking session! haha. Anyway they had a suprise cake for me , but due to my stupid hubby , i came to know everything. haha! No suprise BUT i appreciated. SO MUCH. thank you darling. We ton down a bit. Not having Wine this time round. but only one martell and 3 jugs of beer. + ONE SH'S BARCARDI 151. simple celebrations , hope all of them enjoyed as much as i do. Feel so bad as the next day all of them got to work / school and they all were rushing for time to be back home. so sorry. But i enjoyed such a company by you guys. LOVE YOU SISTERS TO BITS!

And well , lastly i want to say thank you darling for granting my 2.5 days leave! haa! without these leave i wouldnt be able to chill out with all my long time no see buddies and sisters. And without him to stay at home to take care my two lill darlings. i dont think im able to enjoy myself too. =D so i want to say , daring " thank you so much , these 3 days of chilling out is a bit long , but hope you dont mind =D i love you darling. "

I LOVE ALL OF YOU !=D

2010-01-24T15:11:00.002+08:00

Sometimes it really makes me wonder ,
Have i ever been happy since I've choosen this path ? I mean i would have the choice to be happy yet this is wad i have been ..

the fark care attitude from him is making me DONT GIVE IT A DAMN. I HATE THIS AND HATE HIM REALLY. but still ? he care? well , married life is like tt husband will not give a damn to wife esp when you have kids. I FEEL SO STUPID AND SILLY. why i choose this path ?

I din expect that i will stop celebrating my bday on my 22 yrs old.
HAA. no point regretting neither can i hope or wish for anything. Perhaps just all the good for my two lill darlings. Some time i feel stupid treating him good and stupid always make myself loving him so much. just like a dumb. Perhaps i should really move back my place ? well ? perhaps seeing and facing each other everyday makes one feels numb.

THIS YEAR BDAY I DO NOT HAVE ANY WISH , just that to ... ... ...
AND IM NOT HAPPY AT ALL.
so wad when others asked me to stay happy? with this kind of family? in laws?
faking to be happy perhaps. =)

SO MUCH I WISH TO CRY . I JUST WANT TO HANG OUT LATE NIGHT WITHOUT GOING BACK HOME.

YES I DO.
I dont need any celebrations cause i know nothing makes me smile trufully. i really misses my dear friends as well as buddies, guess this is all i need.

2010-01-21T00:28:00.002+08:00

THIS YEAR SEEMS TOUGH FOR ME.

SO WAD ? WHO KNOWS? EVEN HE , DISSAPOINT ME.
i have no one else. suddenly i missed my home. my own family. i mean my mummy and even my brother. i think they are they best still.

I FEEL SO LONELY HERE.
and yes. the feelings sucks. really sucks.
you know the word ,F-A-K-E.
yar , this is wad i do everyday and in fact facing everyday.

In his world , HE is living in fakeness , including all his family members , you know ? SUCKS!

FARK! IM GOING CRAZY!
THIS IS LIKE PRE DEPRESSION . I CAN DO NTH BUT CRY CRY CRY LIKE CRAZY WOMAN.
URGGH ! FARK UP!

I RELALY WANT TO DRINK DRANK DRUNK AND HACK CARE FOR THAT FEW MINUTES.
even that few minutes might makes my life so much better.
THIS IS LIKE HELL FOR ME.
I've never been like this before.

i miss ... everything. IN THE PAST.

2010-01-19T12:45:00.002+08:00

know wad? darling ytd told me that is he cannot stand all these rubbishs again , he might consider moving back to wdls . I was so elated to hear this. But i know he wont. he's just saying for the sake of saying. It makes me feel so much going back now...

I've been trying to tell myself to take this place just like my house. I wanted to give this place a brand new look , instead of being older and older , we could have just re packed the house a bit and paint the wall with brighter color , this could make the house looks brighter. BUT? this isnt my place to do things that i want to. ESP when this is IN LAW PLACE. i might have to see faces and faces , or stand people talking behind my back when staying here. thats why i have never been happy staying here. NEVER.

I wished so much to moved back. Had abort this idea since darling told me its not possible. But due to somepeople who dont know how to take care of her childrens , and causes so many troubles, now I seem to dislike everyone in the house , seems that i have to tahan faces and words thats i dislike. A MIL that come bias more to boy than girl, HL in wadever she do , thought wadever she did is right, think im stupid mother , A SIL that rely on people to tk of her children , A FIL only talks when he finds things wrong , i somehow think that i cannot comunicate with them. I wanted to treat them so much like my own mummy and family, but somehow their culture totally different from mine , wad can i do ?

I dare not complain to mummy , i dont want her to dislike my hubby , neither his family , although I myself dislike them so much. And she sure asked me to moved back . I know as a DIL im not supposed to create all these troubles , for me and my hubby, but ...

Neither i dare to say anything to him , he might just told off his family, and they might think Im the one causing and complaining all these , thats why I had been receiving faces , and sarcastics and toaccept the way they are. I dont like and im not happy. I dont like when my darling is not at home and I got to see all these nonsenses. Tears always rolled down the cheeks whenever i mention these. How much i wished i can party late night out and return back woodlands unknownlinly.

I really wished mummy can stop working , and i go to work instead of her. so that she can help to take care the babies. instead of leaving the babies here when i can do nothing but to see faces and stand the nonsense from this family.

I know im a bit too much to say all these , afterall its my IN LAWS. I CAN DO NOTHING. BUT TO FACED THEM , AND LEARN TO FACED MYSELF. Mummy somehow seems right , Im only capable in giving birth to the twins , other than that , i dont think im valuable to this family.

His SIL is not a bad person , just that she loves to rely on others. but cant his M just understand that we are a family of 4 also ? and that he just got to take care of his own childrens instead of his Sis's ? wad kind of M is this ? thought her son is still a baby ? If i had never moved back to wdls for those weekends, i doubt darling knows how to change diapers, feedmilk or even bathe for babies. ALL THESE I believe his M will never asked him or allow him to do. they sure scold or say him stupid.

I WANT MY OWN FAMILY. THIS IS NOT WAD I WANT.
I JUST HAVE ONE BIRTHDAY WISH ...
.......................................................................................................

no one can give i know. But this is just a wish.

well its true , no one dotes on jiaying , but its okays , she has me and her daddy.
JOANNE YONGSHENG JIAYING JIAJUN - we are one family.

- additional resolution for this year : learn to be happy.

2010-01-18T00:31:00.003+08:00

my back aches! / pains! =(

Ytd mummy came casue i complain i had no OFF day , and most prob she misses my darlings.
Den , she came and bring my darling girl back!
haa. since she's not really popular among this family. and since all find her temper not good, my mummy loves hers so much. and of cause darling;s girl mummy and daddy love her too. just that instead of girl , the boy stays with us , mummy scare my dear boy's crying. haa!

Alrights. wanted to bring my dear boy out for a walk at vivo initially. but due to someone incapable of taking care her own childrens, and despite all the troublesomes , i or rather WE decided not to go. Its okays. perhaps next weekends or the week after , i ask the babies grandmother to bring them out for a walk =) cause I need to treat their grandmother and grandfather a treat also.

I've supplied out my catalouge of apparels. Am so happy. despite all the babies cryings , and feedings , that kept me so occupied , i still managed to earn a little to keep things going.
And YEA~ IM going to clear and packed his house, i mean partially. Cause its full of childrens toys, where i dont think Im gonna give a damn. Maybe i just paint the house and repacked the house to make the house "NEWER" a bit ? haa* I really cannot stand such a untidy house! i dont know why his families can , and they can just rely on a maid . OMG. =x
Well , since im gonna to stay here for 2-3 yrs , I got to make it comfortable JUST LIKE A HOUSE not a STORE ROOM. a sweet , nice and comfortable house, instead of just letting another day passed like tt. Sometimes when some one had a maid , things and life will change. Which i hate myself to rely on a maid.
PLEASE. someone make sure im still gonna be myself and not even drinking coffee i need a maid to brew for me. PLEASE MAKE SURE IM NOT LAZY!! when the maid comes.

Anyway,

yes! my darlings.

LOVES!

Our girls gathering - meetup 07JAN.09.
ilove yougirls! ENJOY THE NIGHT.

2010-01-14T18:41:00.001+08:00

Everyone says , " daaughter in law can never stays with mother in law" and well its FARKING SERIOUSLY 100% TRUE. I mean no matter how good your MIL is , there will sure be conflicts be it wadever.

AND JUST FARK LA!
i cannot say wad i dont like about her but i just can say i dont like her. SERIOUSLY.
even though if my husband see this. i really farked care. and wad i want to say is sorry. i just cannot stand the way and live in this way.

they say "the world is fair , " fact is the world is NEVER.
boy is still outstanding then girls.
For those DIL out der , so happy for you when you do not have a MIL or IN LAWS that will bias against boys to girls. I mean , i dont give a damn who she bias , but this is too much . I just dont like just dont like. IF MY MOTHER LIKE THIS , I WILL STAY AWAY FROM HER. BUT I CANNOT STAY AWAY FROM MY IN LAWS YOU SEE.

HAIIS. regrets la.

Anyway having such farking backache. Just so wish to go massage. But i think it will just hurt me. i think my spine got prob. just so farking pain.
Sometimes i want to say . dont look things just at one side, AFTERNOON IS THE MOST SUFFERING FOR ME , BUT STILL I GOT TO LET IT PASS. Feeding one after another burping one after another , darlings cry after one another , making them stop crying one after another , making them slp at the same time , FARKING BACK ACHE. but no choice. there's no one in the house can help me. MAID GOT TO REST as she tk my girl at night. ALONE LO. tts why i hate this. i hate. but i got to live with all THESE.

NOISES, NONSENSES, NAGGINGS, HATE THESE!

2010-01-11T13:59:00.002+08:00

one weekend passed so fast.
=)
My darlings are alr 6 weeks old.

Went to maid agency last sat , and she's coming on this thurs / fri.
Her name is Watini. She's almost same particulars as the current one my sis in law having.
Seriously hope she good and listen to me and not being too stubborn. Hope she will be my helpful assistance.

Anyway I strike 4d first prize for 2010. yupx. perhaps i should thanks to my two darlings.
Telling me that their grand ma and grandpa dotes on them a lot. so i bet on my mummy and uncle year. and well , haha it opened. thank you darling.
Although the amount is not enough for all the loans and bills, but still its a luck.

Met up with ying at cwp and Went to see eden and shihui on sat night. Eden grown up so fast!
haa. anyway hope shihui will lead a better life . =)

2010-01-05T21:24:00.002+08:00

THE NEW MAID IS LIKE . WAD THE FARK!

wah laos. making me headache.

She dont have the experienced of taking care babies , then insist on taking care babies.

when im carrying , she insist she wants to carry. Though that the 2 maids can help out each other in the housework as well as babies so that i can be more relax a bit. But end up im more worried then usual.

LOUSY AND USELESS. URGHS!

pissed me off. dont even do basic housework , just stick to babies and when babies slping she sit there watch tv if not stay beside baby wait for them to wake up CRAZY. fark! so easy money i also want.

now ive got to do housework and see babies. IM MORE LIKE A MAID.

IM CHANGING. DEFINATELY!! FARK UP.

I KNOW I COMPLAIN TO MUMMY NO USE.

long story and anyway IM STUPID LA.

REGRETS! GOT EATRA PPLE LIKE NO PPLE. URGH!

And his mum always like to haolian how how how to takecare baby , wah lao, i alr did all the methods la! hao lian wad. I THINK IM QUITE A DIFFICULT PERSON TO LIVE WITH LA .

lucky i got my hubby.

2010-01-04T19:42:00.003+08:00

Today is the first day where the two kids go to school.
and the house is so much quiet. So shiok.
PLUS my darling took leave to accompany me. haa well anyway i had a great day today.

I had my family day on monday =) YEA.
well , i should really say , i must be pampered sometimes. haa.
Someone gave me a present which im craving for.
Although Its not excatly wad i want , but still haa it was meant to be a suprise!

Well, he kept it under the bed and i found it while i was changing the bedsheet.
haa! this is the guy i love so much despite all the scoldings and quarreling.
He still never forget that i needs to be pampered. haha.
thank you darling.

so i want a LV speedy next year!

this is BABY jiajun.
And well , i know im much closer to this lill baby rather then my girl.
Because he is so much light sleeper that he got to sleep in different room with meimei.
And so meimei needs others to take care. den as time passes, i spent time lesser with her.
But no worries, i still love both la. both my precious. i mean our precious.
Will post darling girl pictures th next time with all her funny acts =)

I love my family. Our small little one. sweet and loving one. =)
Anyway thank you darling. really. i know i have been unreasonable for the past few weeks la. But I wont because one bag i stop quarrelling one.. LOL. Sorry for all the torlerance. I love you baobei . and my baobeis =)

- oh ya! cut my hair today , and he said i look tomboy! >.<
- slimming plan needs to start !!
- IM awaiting for thurs my sisters gathering! I MISS THEM ALL. AND I LOVE THEM TOO.

2010-01-02T21:38:00.002+08:00

am back home. - woodlands.
yes. fri sat and sun.
Seriously if i have enough help , i do not wish to go back.
yesterday darling asked me , " i really dont know who make you so fed up, and who step on my tail " i kept quiet. seriously no one. I just dun like the way THEY are loh. the way they talk, they way they live , their lifestyle , the way they had their lunch dinner or even breakfast , the way they teach ppple to do things , they way wadever it is , i just dont like. i dont know why darling is part of them yet i can accept but not his family.
seriously am i that fussy? i mean , i just want all to be happy. they are so fake that i dont like. well , wad can i say , its their lifestyle for the past 26 years or more ...

I certainly will miss mummy and they way we used to live in , without naggings , without restrictions , without stress . and well , its my family.

was struggling whether to keep the current maid , she's so ... i hate it . perhaps im just so not used to have a maid around , instead of ordering her around , i do more things as usual . we treat her like a guest! haha. but im also glad , mummy did not hire maid in the past . if not i believe i would ended up like everyone in his family. used to the habit of after drinking eating , theres pple to clean and wash for them , or even just making a cup of coffee they will ask for help. well , its just their habit , i shall and can say nothing.

oh yar, my troubles and problems seems the negative side from jess. a newly wed couple. well , so glad she is staying happily with her in laws. but still hope they would get their own house in case of problem like THESE.and here i want to wish her to stay happily ever with her hubby . and faster have a baby , then my babies will have more friends , including sh's one .
As for the rest i hope they are staying happy too with their own partners.

Though they are always busy , hoppe they are also getting finel

here i am lying on my bed typing this entry. had been stiicking to my two darlings since morning. taking turn to drink milk , taking turn to bathe , taking turn to cry , taking turn to make them slp . well , enough to last the whole day but doing all these, and truely , 1 day passed just like tt.
darling will be back tmr. - frm duty.

Just in case he kpo, and saw this post , i want to tell him once again ,
" sorry darling. im not trying to make life difficult for you . i understand . but u know i really dislike . and since we made a promise that we are to confide in each other no matter wad , that why i find no reasons to hide wad im thinking from you. As nfor you , if you dont like or anything please do let me know . i will tRY to be more understanding okay ? im really sorry. i know you had always been on my side, trying all ways to make me happy and stress-less. here i really wanna say thank you. despite all the attitudes towards you , but i want to let you know i love you -) pls darling , dont relyon ur mum so much , i promise i will earn enough money to cover back all expenses so you wont be so xingku. okay ? =) i loveyou. <3

2010-01-01T13:16:00.003+08:00

01/01/2010

Yes. It's a NEW YEAR.

JUMBO at indoor stadium.

yes. 2009 last hour last min and sec im with my hubby as well as his buddy and wife.

Yup , the fireworks are nice. although its not really full view from indoor stadium , but at least we can see somthing. the night was not a good start initially. going out just a while created so many problems. But still i went out with my darling. and left my two small darlings at home.
Wanted to spend the new year with them but ... sorry darlings mummy is a bit playful. haaa.

oh yar. before the fireworks, we had jumbo meal. den after firework , we spent the first thing watching movie. - bodyguards and the assasin. Well, then i came to know china people in the past are so country lover. hmm i mean , they willing to sacrifice their live to protect their country. So touching la. =) it was nice , but i was damn tired.

reached home settled everything , and it was 5am, was so tired. woke up at 10am , due to darling boy cry. What i must say , life is so different when you have babies, they really just keep running in our minds. Was so worries , house could not handle them and worry so much about this and that...

My 2010 new resoultion:
- my darlings grow up happily and healthy.
- my big darling LOVE ME MORE. haa
- to give in more and understand my big darling.
- To buy gucci bag or from my BIG darling . hahaha
- to earn more money , for a BETTER LIFE.
- to be able to slim back to 50kg.
- To be more independent.

- my darling not to rely on his mum so much
- To sleep more.
- To have more rights and say in the family.
- Hmmm ... shall fill up the rest next time. haa.

Anyway i love my family. my 3 darlings. happy new year !
And of cause happy new year to all my friends and sisters!

2009-12-31T11:45:00.003+08:00

my sleeping beauty

see how my darlng can lie and sleep. =D and see how bad his face is =(

yeap , their ONE mth celebration at peach garden. 27thdec

and buffet at home. at blk 46. 24thdec

Yes , the twin babies in their twin uniform. haha

with their presents.

their cupcakes.

-------------------------------------------------------------------

"SHE" thought everyone's like her daughter , hacked care.
"SHE" thought im not able to take care of my own babies.
"SHE" has a very simple minded and navie thinking/
"SHE" would just follow what people say .
"SHE" would nagged and nagged at times when i find it irritating.
"SHE" would interfere on how i take care of my own babies.
"SHE" is someone i dont really like yet sometimes its okay to me.
I dont know is it because of "SHE" that i dont really like to stay here.
Or perhaps is "THEY" .

Alrights forget all unhappiness.
2009 is ending soon. and its 2010 tmr!
Counting down tonight. New maid - malica arrived yesterday. She did not really know how to take care babies and seriously im a bit worries yet i dont dare to tell him. i scare he's worries and dont want to let me have the help from maid.
Anyway im getting a bit pissed and crazy with the staying here with SO MANY people, the naggings ad asking kids to lower their volume.
The help of malica although making me worry , but at least she can help out in the house work since the current one is not doing a good job on house work.
AHHH. this sucks la. i mean no planning no anything. i dont know wad to do. if i can i really hope to take care them myself. But i really cannot ... And suprisingly , the kids snatch for this malica. haiis.

darling jiajun and jiaying is both down with rashes and bought them to mt avernia for check up.
Poor jiajun face was a bit dried up and was itchy that he always rubbed his cheeks that had made it worsen. Doc prescribe a better cream and now he's back to his handsome lill prince face. haa! and as for my darling girl , she's down with another kind of rashes, so doc had prescribe diff kind of cream. As for their bloated stomach , its all cause by all those elderies ," baby must drink more milk, fat then cute" and WTF! doc said " fat babies normally ended up with many illness in future. let them grow at their own rate." well , "SHE" heard tt. its good. but will it help my babies? OVERFEEDING. HAIIS. WHY WHY WHY. heartburning. why? =(
Thats why im so particular bout burping. cause i know if they dont burp well , they will be so uncomfortable.

2009-12-25T17:38:00.000+08:00

CRAZY CRAZY CRAZY
YES. THIS SUCKS!

2009-12-21T14:32:00.002+08:00

one month passing soon.

And yes my two darlings turning 1 mth old~ =)
My darling boy is down with rashes all over his face , due to some in experienced nanny where she uses shampoo mixing with water and bathe for him. Hope he can recover from all thes rashes before his full month . I believe he also wants to be handsome on his first month eh =D
though not many people free to come for their full month , but its alrights.
As long as they are healthy and happy through out their growth. im happy. i believe their daddy too~

Hope they stay healthy and happy ~

Im bck to TB. and this is a noisy place. i really hates this . On and Off i will have to torlerate with their noise and cryings. Back in wdls , house might be quiet , and no much help , but im really still happy. i like my hubby tk babies tgt with me. i feel the happiness. =D i mean , i know though he's tired and he's a prince back at home, but at least at my place , he can learn to take care babies , instead of a wood dun know anything. His place pple too pampered him. so he wont learn anything back at his place. I just love the feeling of a family work and help out tgt. i mean me my hubby and babies. not here! =)

and its my off day on wed. But im worries as i had to pass the babies to an in eperienced nanny to handle , im worry. but theres no other alternatives. after this wed , im going to take care my darlings myself. Properly! People who likes to di siao siao and likes to use their old methods or ways to treat my babies. fark off!

2009-12-12T10:21:00.002+08:00

im back in wdls.

I know im not doing the right thing.
But for all i know , Im so much happier this way. Really.
But as for him , he's in between. I dont know wad should i do.
I want him to be happy too. But we do not have any plans.
I just know that i dun like his parents planning. neither any one's idea in the house. Other than him. Cause i know he is doing for my sake. So i really must thank him.

I know he do not like coming back. I know he do not know wad to explain to his parents.
I knoe his parents want to see the babies.
But wad is this want to see yet complaining tired of taking care ?
I know they have own biz. I know they are tired. so i take care of myself loh.
Yet they tell me dont tk when you cannot make it and seems like they are trying to tell me , " not to bu zi liang li" I know they do not have this meaning , but the conflict and mess at his place are ... farked up. i cannot take it. i just dont like. i just hope i can finish my confinement happily without crying..

Tears just cant stop rolling since the first day i start my confinement. =(
But lucky darling stand by me. Im really appreciate it.
But im not trying to make you in a difficult position. Just that i really hope you can understand , unless you want me go under depression , if not i really hope to finish my confinement happily with you smiling too...

I know your parents will not be happy. But since they can be selfish , cant i just let babies stay with me for just 1 mth ? since , they find that babies crying will wake them up from their slp. I rather wish that my husband has got no family biz. and so life would be easier? =)

And way i love you darling. dont forget this. No matter how busy or how messy the conflict is , i just hope you'll rem. i love you so much.
Thank you for trying to make my days better . I hope staying with me , and babies will make you happy instead of the travelling dist to your workplace.
I really hope you could talk t hings out with me when you feel troubled too . i wouldnt want you to stress too. and i wouldnt want to leave you =)

thank you darling.

2009-12-10T13:14:00.002+08:00

Im not trying to give my hubbby all these nonsenses , neither am i going to create so many troubles.
But all these are making me going crazy , from heart pain , heart break to now , PISSED OFF.
My tears are alr dried up. Im sick of crying seriously.
Im more of anger than sad.

You know? Im so stressed up! I've been thinking of ways to make myself relax.
SMILE? in this family , smiling is just FAKE-ing!
I seem to have passed my both babies to other people.
It somehow seems that they just want me to give birth to these two kids.
And i dont need to take care. I seems useless too.

SERIOUSLY. I WANT TO SMOKE , I WANT TO DRINK OUT OF ALL THESE NONSENSES.
if you all want to take care babies so much , just go ahead la. NB , CB , KNN , CCB , PCB! FARK ! URGHH!! I just want to resume my world of social. SINCE YOU ALL DONT WANT TO GIVE ME A CHANCE TO TAKE CARE BABIES, SO YOU ALL THINKING IM BABy AS WELL ? IM IDIOT ?
I'VE hired a nanny , so call "experienced" nanny , to MAKE MY LIFE DIFFICULT AND SUFFERING. THANK YOU SO MUCH. TRYING TO SPOILT MY CHILDREN AND SHE JUST WANT MY BABIES TO DEPEND ON HER. CCBLA!!!! FARK.

IM JUST SO PISSED LA. FARK FARK FARK.

Only when hubby's back i have the feeling that im mother of 2 kids , otherwise , i feel extra in this family. i feel so out , i feel not needed , im ALONE.

I WANT TO GO BACK TO MY HOUSE, MY HOME.
OUT OF ALL THIS NONSENSES! WAH KAOS. THIS CONFINEMENT TO ME IS LIKE 10 YRS INSTEAD OF 1 MTH. IS LIKE HELL TO ME LA. FARKED UP. CCB LA!! NBCBPCB!

Ps. sry darling, im not trying to make your days difficult. im not trying to flood u with complains. please understand me that im staying in ur house - so ALONE , SO LONELY. you know? im going crazy. you know? i just cant learn to be fake. but im trying to be sarcastic. yes! im learning.

2009-12-06T14:45:00.003+08:00

6/12/09
Took my bathe with the herbal thingy. Despite that , used some normal water to clean my face. Cannot imagine using the herbal stuff to wash my face. haa.

Wow. the feeling was shiok!
And slimmed down a bit. Way to go!
Before babies born , i weighs about 73kg and then when baby out i was 65kg
Doc told me im slim, no fats inside. only babies. I look at him and laugh , saying , oh man ,my stomach like fats inside. Till today is the 12th day , and im 59kg! haha despite eating all the rice, you know? BIG BOWL RICE? i can be 59 still.

Anyway all snatching babies now.
MY CONFINEMENT SUCKS.
REST ? NO. ITS MAKING ME WORRYING SO MUCH.
MY 2 DARLINGS. Being treat in those OLD AND TRADITIONAL WAY. SICK AND TIRED OF COMPLAINING SERIOUSLY. Even my babies cry , I cannot carry. CL snatch to take care. And she wanted to BKL, Making her self miserable and tired , and then she complained. Trying to be funny. IM BABIES MUMMY! After confinement , no one is to SNATCH TO TAKE CARE.
I hate my babie fall on other pple hand. They use differnt way to tk of them , their OWN FUNNY WAYS. Where i see babies dun like, YES YES YES! I MEAN I CANNOT ACCEPT IT.

My big darling is the wrost , he had got to see to everything . tahan my complains and to work things out. Well, hes the one wanted this CL. But i know its tough for him still.
My tears going to be dried soon. Somehow it just roll down uncontrollably upon seeing how CL taking care of them , TOTALLY OPPOSITE FROM WAD THE HOSPITAL NURSES AND DOC TEACHES ME. It's heart pain. I dont know wad is right and wad is wrong. I know this confinement sucks sucks sucks. YES! SUCKS TO THE CORE! URGGHH!!!! CBNBKNNAKSJDBFBDHWDND!

I JUST HOPE TIME FLIES FAST NOW! PLEASE SPEED UP!!

JIAJUN AND JIAYING NOW IS 12 DAYS OLD. DARLINGS , YOU WILL BE 1 MTH OLD SOON! BE HEALTHY!!

2009-12-04T12:14:00.004+08:00

MY MARRIGAE LIFE WITH THE TWO LILL DARLINGS + BAOBEI

since 31st may 2009

This is the life where I have never though of since young. I have never thought of having a husband and babies at the age of 21. Neither have i thought that life would be tough and yet i got to be strong.

I have been staying with in laws for almost one year. And life here isnt as good as I thought initially. I believe none would love to stay with in laws. Everyone , including my own mother , she advised me to moved out as soon as possible if me and darling are able to financially supported. Trust me , this is the promise im gonna make - to be independent and stronger , to earn as much as possible to lessen my darling's financial.

My dearest darling : I know that , all the loans and bills are making you going hay wire , and you need to partially support by your mum. You know what ? This is wad i dislike. I want to make sure you are out of mummy's financial help. I want you to rely on me instead of your mum. I want you stop being mummy's boy. I will make sure we will still be happy even though financial is tight. Trust me , I'll worked extra hard , not abandoning our two lill darlings. How i wished , the 5 yrs could passed quickly and we'll be able to stay on our own. I know all my complains had flooded you. And you are sick and tired of all my complains. But seriously , im not feeling good, not making you in between , but i find and think i should be more stright forward rather then hide my feelings to you . I think and hope you know how i feel.

MY DEAREST TWO DARLINGS : Im so sorry , mummy could not give you the best of all. But trust me and give mummy , daddy time to give you all a better environment rather then squeezing in a family of 12. Mummy promised that you will not be spoilt and have the best of all things. Your names changed but it was fine as darling girl , you smiled upon hearing your names being called. Although mummy did not take care well of you since you are born , but no matter how tough it is im going to survived through these to make sure you grow up well. =D I believe daddy too! <3>

Seriously 12 people staying under one roof , now including babies is 14 people staying under one roof is not easy . Firstly staying with in laws is a problem, and then come another problem where staying with in-laws relatives is wrost. more come to wrost is that they nagged wadever they wants. ON AND OFF without thinking whether they are right or wrong. They probe into other people biz as if its theirs own. I know sometimes they are for my own good sake. But over doing it will be known as - IRRITATING.

But still i love my darlings and baobei. Without you guys , my life would be boring too. But now i warned you LEE YONG SHENG , if you only care about babies , Im gonna slap you till your face sore!

... LIFE ISNT EASY WITH IN-LAWS.

26-11-2009

Woke up early in the morning 4.45am preparing heading towards Mt Avernia , That is the day babies gonna be born , the pressure in my stomach is coming out to see the world , to see their daddy and mummy . Reached Mt Avernia with no much feeling. was lost. Did not know how should I react to the later operation. All i could do and know was , im going to operation soon.

Inside Op theatre , There was many doctors and nurses surrounding me. All telling me to relax. It will going to be my first time lying down on the Op bed. The doctors and nurses are friendly. They were talking about what foods later , and their night the day before. The anesthesia will works on you. and 1 ... 2... 3... The next thing is that you'll go BLANK.

"Joanne joanne , no worries your babies are fine and healthy ..." Waking up saw the clock hanging on the wall , Its 8.24am. The operation took 1 hr. And the operation start ard 735am , which means it takes 15 min , and babies are out to see the world. And half hour for me to regain concious.

Yes. My darlings are born. =)

my loud boy and my slping beauty girl . They weighs around 2.6kg and 2.5kg

Let's have a closed up... Boy and Girl. Regconise? =)

5-6 days later ...

Yes daddy with his precious darling.

Lastly , this is going to be my beloved family. my baobei and darlings.
the one who accompany me to walk finish the rest of my life...

2009-11-22T01:17:00.002+08:00

It has been ages since I've blogged.
And firstly i wanted to congrats my dearest sis , JESSICA , for entering the marrigae life.
LOL! Forget to send sms to congrats her. and suddenly remember but I've left my phone in the shop >.< Once again congrats her and wish her happy ever after~ haha. AND wish her " morning birth expensive son" haha. so SH and my darling got more buddies! lols!
Its too bad i cannot attend. So lazy to dress up . make up and walk with my two darlings.
Sorry darling.

And counting down to the birth of my two darlings.
4 days.
I can see my baobeis darlings! Mummy ad daddy can see you guys ! =D

Counting down ...

2009-10-31T17:49:00.002+08:00

You wont know wad will happen in your life the next moment.
Just like I've got married and Im a married woman with two babies.
And that i cannot be wildful , and playful anymore.

Married life isnt as wonderful as my dream ones.
Anyway "home home got difficult chant bible" la.

Im dissapointed with my husband.
But in the meantime he is my husband i love him
You see how ironic life is ?
Im already trying so hard to change from who i am,bcorz im of different status now.
But he seems to be forcing me to change to the extreme side of me.
He wanted too much of my understanding which i lacked when im single. and learning to be now.
He wanted too much of my independence which im so lousy in. and learning to be less dependent.

BABIES coming out to see the world. See their mummy and daddy.
At least when babies are out , i wont be so boring. Im not alone. I always tot a hubby is for me to rely on. But actually im wrong. He will say tt im being crazy and unreasonable when i need his support and when im too depending on him. He'll get mad before i do if i cry infront of him. He'll just console me with some of his concern when im sad. and thats all.
I only get to talk and have his accompany for 1 hour out of his 24hrs.

And he would tell me , cause he need to work , can i understand him a lill bit.
And so i should say , did i fail to be a good wife ?

In future , when im going to work , and back home to look after babies , will our life be just eat sleep , and babies? will he still be as loving and sweet to me ? Will he still have time for me when i need him ? Will he be leaving me alone when im in trouble ? Or will he just sit aside when im sad?

This is life.
And thats why im a bad problem solver. I chose to run away. Run away from all these when it happened. I chose to come back home where i can feel at least love from mummy and my bro. I feel more relaxing when i need not bother wad others will say.
So should i say actually im not prepared to be married?
Or should i say , im a bad daughter in law?

I really hope my husband would understand. ESP when im preg.
I really hope he'll be der when i really need him , and not the time to eat dinner and chit chat for that 15 min b4 sleep.
I really hope that in future , he will still be there for me and I'll still be der for him when he needs me and when either ones need each other.
I hope he will be less dependent on his mother for financial wise.

Lastly I'll make sure my babies will not worries abt eat slp and play .
As well as Ill make sure husband is mine, I'll promised to worked hard to lessen his burden and stop relying on his mother.

This is joanne. A girl or a married life of hers.

2009-10-27T19:35:00.002+08:00

I wanna go back home.

Stressful .
i dun know why.

Mummy understands. Im glad.
Someone is der.

back ache and no one can be der for me to complain.

AHHHHHHHHHHH.
my pregnancy life is quite stressful lehh.
and being a good DIL actually is not easy.
Can you just let me be a bad DIL for once?
Can i be selfish for once till baby born?

I want a playpent for baby and put at wdls.
babies and i will be going home.

I know it's not fair to darling and it sound a bit ridiculous for darling.
Sorry darling. =)

2009-10-20T23:29:00.002+08:00

IM SO HAPPY!
I know it had been ages since I blogged.

My baobeis are v healthy and Im seeing them soon! So excited. >.<
I love you you love me , we are happy family! haha.

Alrights. Went to taka fair and I've bought HKO!
And two HK sleep wear.
WoOo~

I scare confinement. Thats all.

And I love my darling. Despite all the big and stupid quarrels , we had settled down.
And i know he's doing a lot for me. ALRIGHTS! I'LL TELL THE WHOLE WORLD YOU LOVE ME AND I LOVE YOU OKAYS? =D

DARLING BOY AND GIRL , PLEASE BE NICE TO DADDY TOO . Cause he really love you guys. =) BOY BOY please dont bully your mei mei okay ? =D haha.

And congrats to my darling sis jess.
She's getting married! Congratss!!

2009-10-10T01:25:00.002+08:00

MJ SESSIONS TONIGHT.

But Its a take turn. me and darling as promised. - AND I DID.
I dun like and hate to see him play MJ everytime lose money he give the farked up face.
I mean yar , though his brother lose money also give farked up face.
BUT THAT'S HIS BROTHER ! I DUN LIKE MY OWN HUSBAND TO BE LIKE TT TOO !! WHY IS HE LIKE TT!! IM SO PISSED YOU KNOW.

But i cant voice out anything cause i dun want to quarrel with him again and again over this.
Isnt gambling win / lose ?
WHY MUST he like tt. i really dun like. But i cannot say anything!
Different family different brought up.
I dun really like his brother attitude also. BUT WHY I HAVE TO TORLERATE HIS FAMILY ATTITUDE AND HE CAN GIVE BOSS ARD GIVING PPLE FACE. >.< >love to play MJ. of course i dun like to lose. BUT I DUN LIKE TO SEE HIM GOT POOR ATTITUDE ON MJ TABLE! why my sis-in-law husband lost all chips yets smile smile. BUT MY OWN HUSBAND GOTTA GIVE TT FACE ? you understand how i feel? =(
I want my husband to be loved and liked by everyone.
AND NOT PPLE SPREAD NEGATIVES ABOUT MY HUSBAND.
CAUSE HE IS MY HUSBAND. DARLING, DO YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL?

I wanted to tell him to calm down. but all he do is just go in his own ways. he HAte his brother!
But isnt brother only got one ? Cant he just love his brother?
I have my brother too. and although he got farked up attitude , but because now we are wdl - tb apart , we treasure. Ah boy will drop by with his bike and come and find me.
Although we seldom talk. But i will say I love my brother - sebastian tan. I love my family.
AND I'VE REALISE ONLY BECOZ WE'VE BEEN THROUGH. BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH. and we are apart now.

I hope pple will not only treasure when they lost. So now, i have my family , i have mummy , uncle , ah boy , i love them. =) so much.

And so... MJ ending soon. Im gonna stop talking and listen to his NOT HAPPY COMPLAINS WHEN HE LOST MONEY OR EVEN WHEN I LOST HIS MONEY. I hate yet love MJ. =(

I really want so much that my own husband can take things easy and forgiving and not a narrow minded , crafty and not understanding one .

I SHALL just smile through the night.
darling. i hope one day you will undertsand wad i mean and the importance of presenting yourself. I just want the good thing for you. and not being critise by people. Cause you are my darling.

2009-10-09T15:02:00.002+08:00

I love my darling hubby!

I love you i love you i love you!
hAha.

Well, so much wanted to eat tang yuan.
Called mummy, she din even want to answer.
Make me so pissed off. And still shouted. URGH!
Well , den the next moment i've got tangyuan from hubbby.
It was so sweeet. omg!
Ilove you darling.

My darling babies , inside my stomach keep stretching.
They must be no space inside alr. lol!
Im carry ... hmmm* 1.5 kg + 1.5kg + water bag. 3 + ard 5 kg .
8 KG! lol.
I want to see my darlings asap. But daddy not free . so appt got to delay. =(
I wanna see darlings la!!! >.<

2009-10-01T15:00:00.002+08:00

So tired >.<
I dun know whether am i tired or so full of energy.
I can jolly only slp in the morning , 10 - 1pm. Midnights i can jolly stay inside the toilet.
babies kicking so powerful dat my stomach always go out of shape.

MON AND THURS.
i hate these two days.
I hate to sit at the cashier there with the stomach, it makes my back pain and when i sit long , i just wanna vomit. I just dun like to see the people downstair. the customers all.
The air downstair always make me not feeling good. I always vomit when i come up. i hate this la.
Why must his family own provision shop? I mean , if one had got not eough hand to tend the shop , dont take in any more orders.

I just so wish to go home and so i can slp in the afternoon and not worry abt people saying " wah joanne is so nua... or wadever" AHHHH!! so pissed. I cannot even sleep when i want.

Even though now we own our own house, BUT WADS THE USE?!
WE CANT EVEN STAY INSIDE. ITS OUR HOUSE YET WE CANT STAY IN >.<
HAD TO BEAR ALL THESE.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Darling faster finish ur course. i dun want tend shop!
because like tt weekends u also need to tend shop . IM SO BORED AND SICK AND TIRED .
MOULD ME ANOTHER MR LEE.
I WANT MORE CARE AND CONCERN FROM MR LEE.

2009-09-14T22:12:00.003+08:00

IM FARKING BORED.

DUN LET ME PLAY MJ ! FARK LOH DAMN ANGRY.
I GIVE BIRTH DE TIME CANT HE JUST PLAY TILL HE HAPPY AND SHIOK..
FINE LA.

ANYWAY SMOKERS WONT WANT TO PLAY WITH PREGNANT PPLE LA.
FORGET IT THEN.

I'LL SPENT MY NIGHTS OUT THE NEXT TIME.
WITHOUT YOU.

2009-09-13T01:50:00.004+08:00

I cant believe im watching football now!!
LOL!
yar. TOTTHAM V.S MAN U.
Such a Stupid match. ALL the kicks.. omg!

my darling is on duty.
My uncle went malacca.
And so .. me and mummy become two lonely woman. HAHA.
We went ah ma house.. Acc her eat and nua-ing at her house
Bought 2 nice nice bras again. haha And mummy acc me back to TB.
I love mummy, my family and all! muacks!

Back home early. And doing online stuff.
I dun understand why pple msg me for details and gone MIA -.-"
Preorders jackets all at jtmall.blogspot.com
All cheap cheap! and nice nice =D

My darling is coming back 7 more hrs! SLP AND WAKE UP I'LL SEE HIS PIG FACE!
YES!
LOL ! Craving for steamboat ! might be having with mingji and his wife and maybe heading to comex too.

OH YA! IM 63KG now. 2.5 more mths to go ...
Babies babies i love you. Fast fast grow up healthly. =D

2009-09-07T16:17:00.002+08:00

2/3 more mths to go ...

Baby jia xuan and jia le , mummy will see you.
I will the the 2 babies always kicking hard in my stomach.
lol.

I have become so not independent.
So depend on husband.
Which i think tt is so not good.

Tried to drank milk with coco crunch.
but wanna vomit. =(

SO BORING.

2009-08-30T23:16:00.002+08:00

Had my family dinner at kallang LONG BEACH . Because my cousin is going back AuSt.

The dinner is nice! but i bet its ex also. cause the presentation of the dinner was so nice.

On top of that, there are 3 other dishes that i did not take the pic.

Everyone was warm and nice. I enjoyed the dinner =)

Although gynae say that i should take control of sugar stuff , as he scare during preg there's mild dibetics, but darling and me went suntec ytd and had our sweet dessert. lol. it was so sweet and nice having dessert with darling.

And today darling gave me a suprise. He bought me a digital camera which i pinned for so long...

I just want a camera belongs t me all along. but i know if i buy , it will be a waste of money , so i always cant bear to buy one. But he got me a pink Sony cam . lols. it was meant to be a suprise. and im really happy. He said it was our 1 yr anniversary present. so sweet of him. i love you darling. <3

And come to mention about money , ytd we forget to buy 3175 system . and there goes our $500!! i had bought 3157 , 3517 but not 3175 !! So wasted. Had just forget to buy system and it open =[ And today got lucky no. and got only $150. if only ytd had bought the system no. , darling would not waste so much money by giving me a suprise . but a lucky camera by luck =x

Lastly , darling is going to leave me alone for his duty on 12th sept , and im going to be alone =( i dun like. I will be so lonely. Just so love you my love! <3

2009-08-28T23:57:00.002+08:00

I'm so bored that im at home thinking of a better plan to promote my online shop.

A real life model instead of images .
profits to the model.
Do supply.
With profits earned , I'll get some professional to do my website.
To get my own domain.
Set up members privillages.
promotions.

Steps by steps. I know it wont be fast to achieve what i want. But i will try to achieve wad i wish =)

My dearest friend is admitted to hospital bcause of preeclampsia. Where it is so dangerous . so worried for her. That silly girl is always taking the responsibilities of everything herself. Wanted to go visit her, i know she will be lonely. But she dun want thus i can only hope her only baobeii in her stomach now , is as healthy as her mum =) Dun scare girl , your baby eden will be with you =) hees!

2009-08-23T23:47:00.002+08:00

Happy First year anniversary darling , My love.

I love you.
Thank you for all these 365 days your tender love and care.
I appreciate all of these. Though i did not say anything. But I love you more than anything else.

I know these will be never ending...
Muacks!

2009-08-21T14:02:00.002+08:00

Thunder and Lightning !

RAINING SEASON ...
staying at home is bored.
But Lucky darling will be back home early to acc me.

Mummy is having chalet. Had cancelled it initially. Because of my dearest friends supposingly coming. And because today D/S got COCONUTS. errh. but since they are not coming i dun wanna stayed home alone. So no matter how heavy the rain is i will still go chalet. =D Just that darling will be steal away by the shop cannot acc me. The shop need him more than i do today.
HAIS. boring.

Babies babies , faster grow up and acc mummy.
Mummy daddy loves you.

2009-08-16T00:40:00.002+08:00

today is saturday night .
But my hubby is on duty =( so miss him. but no choice he has to work.
And 3 of us depend on daddy.
WE LOVE DADDY.

And and and so WENT out with mummy, of cause dun wanna stay at home alone la.
Went to JP zhou kitchen. HAD a very very full dim sum buffet. My baobeii mummy always spend her time searching for buffet and cheap yet nice food and asked me out for lunch or high tea. haha. so funny . But i appreciate her effort. And its really nice. =)

Went back home and nua and she knew i do not like to be alone , so she accompanied me through out till i came back to tiong bahru. I miss her really. Taught her how to use pipi player , how to use viwawa and how to use msn. And she learnt them fast as well as the video call for msn.

Reached home and then had an one hour video call with mummy. haha she's so cute and funny okay. And im so happy. I LOVE MUMMY.

Tomorrow meeting up with mummy and ah boy to ah ma house. hope they are going. Cause ah ma misses them. And of cause with my baobei darling.

I love mummy and my baobei darling. I just cannot live without them =D

2009-08-11T16:14:00.003+08:00

So long since i've blogged.

Life is everyday the same for me except back getting more aches and pain.
And fatter as each day passed.
My 2 little babies always kick and roll non stop inside me. lol daddy is always so happy to feel them kicking and rolling.

Looking back at the wedding videos and each time i see this video i feel touched by my darling. lol! Actually i do have a very good darling who loves me as much as i love him. He always made me feel loved and touched except SOMETIMES when he can really pissed me off. EG sleeping tru out the afternoon and giving me attitude at certain times. But recently he said and did smth that touched me so much. He asked me whether can i treat him better and dun treat him that bad? everything he do or did are all for me and babies.. and he knows i always get pissed off if he wakes up later then me. thus those weekends he would get himself awake earlier then me tot buy breakfast. I know. i really feel and received the love from him. Perhaps im just being so selfish that i always care about myself . But no worries darling. i will always be there for you even though i dun say it out. Sometimes i do feel so blessed . Really. thank you my dear. i know you are a good husband and daddy. Sorry and pardon me for my childishness? =)

I Love You.

2009-08-02T14:14:00.003+08:00

wow. today is alreadly 2nd aug !

Time fliess fliess. babies alr i think 5mth plus.

with all their legs and hands stretching and kicking. i could hardly sleep in the night.

but to turn here and der . and only to sleep in the day.

But well , their daddy love to feel their kicking. lol He would placed his face on baby and babies will kick his face.

Yesterday was a happy day for me.

Had ah yat dim sum buffet with mummy and uncle at shaw tower , it was yummy. omg! full. and yet cheap. haha going to bring my girls to eat der for a chit chat session instead of sushi now... i love mummy!! =D then after that wanted to head for suntec , but think ytd was having national day preview. crowded , so we headed to united square to take all my mac hello kitty collectioons!

I've bought baby first stuffs. bought a hello kitty clothes for girl and boy ... hmmm daddy bought winnie the pooh - anchor. for boy. well , there's so many so many hello kitty baby stuffs at united square!! omg!! not only hello kitty stuffs but all baby stuff all over at united square! lol. omg. its shopping heaven for baby! =D

there , cute right? haa.

Bought his nephew ben ten presents , and saw those hahacrabs. so cute!

And lastly at night , i came to know that i've strike 4d again! yea! baby knows mummy wants to buy clothes for them , and they blessed us .

So happy. it was a happy day for me.

i love mummy , my family and my two small baobeiss , as well as big baobei la! =D muacks!!

2009-07-22T22:32:00.002+08:00

had aijisen with liting and sunny.
OH MY GOD.

it had been ages since in last seen them.. eh i mean ever since my wedding. =D

so boring.
Im awaiting for fridAy to meet up with my sisters.
Sick and tird of staying at home lehh. =[
But my stomach getting bigger. =D
And had check up ytd. - its a boy & a girl!
hees. i love my two lill darlings.
and i want to buy many many hello kitty for girl girl and boy boy.. ehhh up to daddy bah. =D

I miss mummy right now.
im alone. i miss mummy i miss mummy i miss mummy. hees.

2009-07-13T23:14:00.002+08:00

Why do people only know how to blame on people when there's mistake done?
It's human nature?

that's so funny.
As if the person who blam others , does not have any faults.

Farked it la.

Anyway one may think that i am so negative.
But in fact it's because i only blogged when im pissed and sad.

I realised im someone who will never learned to face the truth .
I just love to hide or run away when theres problems.
AND THIS IS TRUE.

i know mummy know this
cause i;ve explanined everything to her. I believe only mummy know. and one and only.

2009-07-11T19:03:00.002+08:00

Another day has passed. and im back to my lovely woodlands.
And had my breakfast cum lunch cum dinner at this lovely home.
Cooked by my lovely mummy and her lovely heart.

It's unexpected trip back.
Wanted to go vivo for walk and then early movie.
But i think i will never and can never watch evening or afternoon movie but just midnight movie.

I met up my sisters tt thursday.As well as on monday with my dear lesly tan.
Met up with lesly and had complained totally for 2 hours. If not for her listening ears, i think im down with depression too. haha.
But anyway im so glad that i have these sisters still. Cause im losing my guys buddies.
Though i did not have much contacts with you guys, i DO HOPE you guys will not forget my exsistance. JOANNE'S EXSISTANCE. please. i do kept you guys in mind, just that now im not able to go and do wadever i like. But i will never forget you guys were and will always be my buddies. loves!

Well actually if nothing goes wrong on the thursday meeting , ALL of us could meet. But still in the end there are left with the 3 of us.
But still im contented.
WELL , LIFE AND TIME WILL NOT STOP BECAUSE YOU WANT IT TO BE.

"Something whispers in my ear and says
That you are not alone
For I am here with you "

2009-06-27T17:25:00.002+08:00

im back home.
and yes. im back home.

Had nothing much to do except wait for mummy's bird nest.
talking abt waiting tt fellow finish hius duty? i dun think i will be waiting.
Since i think he care more abt sleeping, i think perhaps in future when he's working i will not bother him neither will i give him a text. in case im also those annoying wife.

Read some informations on pregnancy now.
which is i think 1 or 2 weeks later then 18weeks?
week 18

Maternal Changes:
Feeling dizzy, lightheaded or faint are normal during pregnancy. These symptoms aren't harmful unless they occur frequently or severely. "Postural hypotension" is low blood pressure due to a change in position and happens frequently in pregnancy because your cardiovascular system doesn't react as fast.

--- was rather scare that i got my low blood back. it was quite scary. and you know? one got to be more strong when im only alone. I dun want to be said that why am i of so many problems. and beingg compared. I HATE BEING COMPARED. FARKED.

Ideas for Dad:
Are you a "Mr. Fix-It" kind of guy? It's common for dads to feel very protective of moms. Often, Mom will need a big shoulder to cry on and get out all of those crazy pregnancy emotions. Dad can feel rather helpless listening to Mom carry on, and in his frustration, try to do what he can to "fix" whatever she's grumbling about. Dad, relax. Nine times out of ten, Mom just needs to vent and really doesn't expect you to act upon her complaints. As hard as it may be for you, just LISTEN! Give her your undivided attention. This is the best gift you can give to Mom.

--- there is this sentence , "Often, Mom will need a big shoulder to cry on and get out all of those crazy pregnancy emotions." I think he is so used to it and might even think im crazy.
If i am to go to a place where i can shout it out i would want to go to some where far to vent everything instead of staying in a SHELL and facing the same thing EVERYDAY AND EVERY MOMENTS. sometimes i really need someone to love me more than i do. Now i know and realised , a mummy is that great, rather then dad. she has got to face wadever difficulties all alone by HERSELF.

urgh. im sounding bad. but i know MY mummy still care and love me , including my brother. or should i say MY FAMILY. =) im blessed. And if i were to choose i would want to stay with them like his sister could stay with her own family even after marriage.

im thinking negative.
I know.
But this is wad im feeling. i just feel like going somewhere else or stay in some other places. to avoid those rules i dunt like.

I JUST HOPE THAT...

I will have you to be with
Everything will be easy
晒的阳光
淋的雨滴
都值得回忆
I have you to be with
才懂心不够近才怕距离

2009-06-26T16:33:00.002+08:00

my eyes had been so itchy and sore for the past few days.

Rubbing and rubbing. urghs!

And i dont know wad had happened to me.
I realised many things these few days.

Becoming a wife or others daughter in law , is not easy.
The responsibilities have becoome so much.
You need to balance up and make both parties happy.
Not offend them , you got to bear wadever you dun like.
And one got to torlerate. EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING.

this is not easy. really it isnt.
my life revolves around television , provision shop , children , mj , tiong bahru.
Im going crazy.

How much i wished i have my life like i ever had before.
FREE and easy. anywhere i can go , dun need to inform ir say anything.
how much i wish , my friends would be more free for me and be der when i need.
But times changed.

No one will do anything for you other then you face it and overcome them yourself.
I know. crying isnt any solutions. he has been so numb to it.
I just want my bao bei to be born blissfully and i've live with them instead of all these.
My life will resume next year.
TELL ME ITS GOING TO BE FAST.
my patience of torlerating is .... i think so.

2009-06-22T16:26:00.003+08:00

went to science centre last monday.
with 2 darlings.
since year i've been to science centre.
All thank to darling for his EARLY COMPANY EXCURSION.
but stil it was quite fun.

IM so bored!!

But im meeting sisters tml!

i always looking forward for this day.

hahaa. cause i practically nothing to do. so boring.

IM GOING CRUISE!

HAHA .

darling dun allow me to go genting so he say im able to go cruise!

lol. looking for good company deals/package.

And talking about it. I've decided to do GUAM for honey moon trip!

instead of japan.

GUAM IS SO NICEEEE SO ROMANTIC. OMG!

IM BORED LAAA. URGH!

I had met up with my mum these few days . i love and miss her.

hope she is happy.

And she has just bough a new bike for my brother.

where my brother do not dare to ride it. hahha.

now my whole family got liscence. i mean CLASS 3. EXCEPT for my brother.

HE claim he has it. and its PDL. =x lol

Driving is tiring . so i rather to have a driver to drive me here and there instead of driving myself. haha. this is none other then my husband ! =x

BOREDDDDD!

IM JUST LOOKING FORWARD TO TML.

waiting for darling finish workkkkkkk ..

2009-06-10T18:52:00.003+08:00

10/06/09

On this day I've finally passed my TP.omg!
After 2 years of lessons and savings and all the travelling!
I FINALLY DUN NEED GO BACK TO BBDC!
HAHA OMG! IM SO HAPPY.
ONE TIME PASSED ! YES.

A very nervous and scary day.
But managed to passed it.
The moment being announced passed , i was so elated . haha
I kept thanking the tester. omg. like ah siao. =x

And right now i also want to thank my husband , mr lee.
He took leave to acc me to BBDC and was there for me to announce when the result was out.
My test took less then 20 min. but the whole procedure took 4 hrs. he had seated der for 4 hrs just waiting for me. silly dumb.
But i love u . =)
I appreciated la . <3

The next thing to get excited and nervous of is the gender of babies. =)
i love u all baobeis.

2009-06-04T15:44:00.003+08:00

more to be uploaded in multiply.

Tody is 4th June.

The 4th day im married to mr lee.
And im MRS LEE now! omg! i just cant believe that im a married woman .
But its nice especially when i have a loving husband.
Wedding video will try to upload asap . Editing from the videographer is needed.
But his gate crashing has really touched my heart. my precious baobei , once in a life time. =)
i love you.

And not to say he was drunk on wedding night and on high fever the past few nights.
It was quite tiring . to take care on and off, wake up often to take his temperature. TIRING! But i had got to take care , else no one else. Anyway hope he recover fast and well. If not like wad i say , i rather im the one suffering then see him like tt.
But to think of it , im a married woman, mummy always tells me i need to be independent now and take care of your loved ones as you are people's wife.

How much i wished mummy can helped me do all these. Im no more a child!!!

We had wonderful stay in hotel.
ANd oh yar! our wedding car plate 2 open out of 4/5. and the lucky no. we picked open on 31st may as well. Yesterday big sweep , our 2126 , open first in system too. Well , many of our relative stirke but not us.
They has been saying we had lucky baobeis.
But our baobeis dun bring luck to daddy and mummy. lol =p i'll still love them!

And its finally endding. Thank you for all who turn up with their sincerity and blessings . i feel all of them ... . and the wedding planners , chris , brian sandee. All put in so much effort to provide us a HELLO KITTY WEDDING. my dream wedding . Although it does not protray my ideal one , but it fufill part of my dream. i love all of you. ! muacks.

Lastly , and the next thing to worry now is my TP. ON 10th JUNE. omg!
After that will be 19th june! - the gender of baobeis.

I miss mummy. i bet mummy miss me too.
She was quite unwilling when groom is outside gate crashing. I can sense her bu she de.
i love her. - she is my precious mummy. one and only. muacks!!

2009-05-23T13:39:00.002+08:00

went checkup.

It was daddy first time looking at babies.
When the gynae said," there , here's his head, his leg and his small little hand waving at you"
His expression was cute.
He was suprised. he was amazed.

And yes i saw his lill hands and fingers , moving as if he/she is waving at us.
Followed by the legs to be up. and his summersault , to cover his face. so cute.
And the other one lie there with his/her legs lying up in the air. >.<

followed by heartbeat checkup.

And many medicines was given to me. haha.

Meeting my sister and getting my gown later .
and its going to rain now!! omg!

2009-05-19T17:08:00.002+08:00

went out with my gfs ytd.
but too bad ended up 3 of us.
We had a chit chat sessions. was fun. but 2 of them got to leave early.
We acc Sh to gynae without checking up and then proceed to kbox.

OMG.it was funny and nice chat in the box.
OMG we chatted things that we had never did before. fun,surprise, and full of jokes la.
I think others would want to know wad we really chatted abt. RAs...
haa.

Alrights anyway. Went bbdc and hdb yesterday to proceed for resale flat stuffs and wanted to find some slots in bbdc for my lesson but ended up -.-" OMG! i've got not enough slots for my LESSONS! and my ftt expired soon!! HELP!
I need at least 3 more lessons!! 3 more slots! PLEASE!

And today will be my gown fitting , quite excited to see them. lol.
my lovely ones.
and shooting is on sunday.
I believe it's going to be a tedious ones.
cause everything is rushing!
And kor seems like first time handle wedding stuffs.
I dont know. he really giving me feeling of first time handling. >.<
Forget it then since its known pple.

I WILL HAVE MY HELLO KITTY WEDDING.

invitation cards is still sending in process ...

2009-05-15T14:29:00.002+08:00

14th MAY 2009.

DISSAPOINTED.

I went isonomia for 1 whole day, thinking why am i like that? or why life is destiny to be like that?
But i know everythin is too late to be said. too late to turn. So i'll faced it and continue the path of way i choose.
I'll learn to be more independent . i'll rely on JUST MYSELF. so wad if i have a parnter?
Its the same with being alone. =)
I don't want to think anymore. spare me the one whole night thinking. SICK AND TIRED.

After one whole night i realised , i can received no love from anyone. Im alrights.
Cause i still have my own family . my mum my uncle and my brothers.
Even if there's no one else in the world give me care and concern , i still have my two baobeis inside me. I should not scare . Cause im not alone.

I've not shed any tears. Till now. cause I find it no meaning . As this is the path i should continue. isnt ? =)

2009-05-07T18:09:00.002+08:00

I saw my bro's tagged.
I realised , it seems like im not a good sister.
But actually wad i wanna say is that , theres no need because of this making yourself feeling like tt. That's stupid isnt? If there's a way, there will . And even if there's isnt any way, it also not ur turn to be in this state that making your life so miserable now. I mean where is she when suggested to be apart. and wad she had tell u when you all had broke off and hugged you? She isnt thinking all about you at all . this is so stupid and sound like farked up la.
Making me pissed off okay. Although my bro is not clever but neither he is stupid wad. I mean boy, theres no need to go to this extend. So wad if you decided to mary her? because of this case? you'll ended up divorcing. I mean have you see your future? Do you want your future to be like tt? dont forget you have 3 yrs in NS yet. and 2 years can change a lot of things. TRUST ME.
Im not telling you to broke off or forget abt this girl here. But just that there's no need to make yourself so miserable because of this thing. I mean leave it to her parents la.. If u insist you want to help her settle her everything , whatever happened in future , dont make yourself coming to me crying. cause it's not worth.
I can be the one when you feel tht no one else can listen to you. Or even if you do not dare tell mummy a single thing. I CAN BE THERE FOR YOU. But dont be too blind in love to do anything. You will see a lot when you come out from NS. you'll know.

3 more weeks to wedding.

2009-04-28T15:15:00.002+08:00

im feeling so ... not good.
well, it has been all days. everyday like tt. so tiring.
Think it will stop after wedding.
oh my god. vomit for the whole day is so tiring.

But , i've got my proposal ring.
haha although he failed to bring me to my dream proposal,
but i appreciated all.
i love you darling.
you have been der for me for the past few weeks when im feeling so bad.
I hope you will be der with me all my life.

i love you,
and of course these few weeks i missed mummy a lot.
i just cannot imagine im still missing mummy when i myself going to be a mummy.
i tell myself i should be strong and brave to tell mummy that. mummy, i love you and i will be strong. =D i love you! =D

im filled with happiness right now. i have everyone's blessings. i have mummy's , darlings, my aunties and friends love. i have so much. i will grow to be brave. =D
and not to forget i have 2 baobeis.

I will be strong! love everyone.

2009-04-24T21:08:00.002+08:00

today is 24th april.
ytd was our 8th mth anni.
lol. time flies.
And today baby is 7weeks old.
and its a twins !

Well, i was shocked so i did not have any reaction when the gynae tell me its a twins.
i was stunned.
im scareed.
PAIN!
but well , leave it to the time den. =)

i have been vomitting for one whole day ytd .
Hope tonight will be better for me.
i've slimmed 2kg but i feel tt im fatter and shortter.
oh my god. fats!

meeting up with my bridemaid tml.
tml there driving lessons and ... nth much. haha.

2009-04-19T21:57:00.002+08:00

today is sunday.

And everything is fine.

Im going to be a happy mummy cum bride.
Cause i've received everyone's blessing. including mummy's.
iloveyou ALL.

IM HAPPY. I REALLY DO.

But im always feeling dizzy and nauseous. not good.
cause the doctor say my blood pressure is only 55.

2009-04-15T13:42:00.002+08:00

alrights.
There's a positive sign!

So that's the reason why i have been vomitting.
The whole family of his was so happy and elated. but not my mum.
I should have expected she will not be in the least of happiness.

These few days , his family had been taking extra care towards me.
I feel it.
I sensed their happiness. I felt mine too. but not totally.
There's still 30% of me not completed. im quite stressed up seriously.
But in the meantime, i felt blissed.

I will have my hello kitty wedding as wad i often said. Although it might not be as grand as i wished , but it's wad i've always wished for. I have and own it.
And im able to design my own wedding gown. As well as a nice kitty dinner.
ROM and wedding will be on the same day.
Everythin will be planned by kor - chris. I love his plan and package.

im happy and blissed with everything. I hope mummy stands with me.
I know she will not be happy. But i hope she'll do.
Mummy, im happy and im blissed. Baby will be a girl girl.
Life will still proceed without stopping.
I have my own family! and i'll settle down. =) im so much contented.

But the first few mths is not feeling good.
vomit and dizzy at times.
but i had not need to worries. pple are taking care of me.
and baby is blissed. =)

right now waiting for mummy to end a smile on her face and the wishing from her.
And i'll be a happy mummy too!

2009-04-11T09:28:00.002+08:00

im feeling so terrible la.
I just want to vomit. on and off.
i dun like the feeling okay. its like, im so hungry i want to eat but i cannot eat to my content. so suffering. =( and i will keep on getting hungry and feeling want to vomit.

i want to cry alr la.
terrible. stupid gastric. stupid stomach. useless la.

Anyway todays is miss sindee 21st bday. she had her celebrations ytd night. and hope she had enjoyed herself. really. may all her wishes come true and her sweet love life with her dearest.
Oh ya! she slimmed so much . omg. farking slim. sorry for the vulgarities la but she slimmed a lot. haha i cannot believe it.! a trip to sydney ? i want! haha

Anyway i've attended 3 parties ytd. supposingly 2?
April's and my cousin. Hope both of them enjoyed themselves.
And may they stay sweet and happy always. smile my dears!

oN coming xinying and daryl and shoonie.
Alright. 6 friends bday can you believe it!! omg!
APRIL! i dun like. haha broke leh.
excluding my office colleagues bday and housewarming present money. >.<

Im so bored now!!!!
omg!
Im waiting for the time and the time waiting for me.
tick-tock-tick-tock.
Im going to be left alone the next whole week. my colleagues is on honeymoon holiday =(
i miss my trip to hongkong too. =(

DARLING I WANT TO GO MACAU!

2009-04-07T13:59:00.002+08:00

life iis ups and downs .
thats the meaning of life.

sick and tiring.

i might be out of job.
because of another leave.
but forget it. what can i do?
im so stupid.

msg mummy ytd mid night. she replied.
im so touched. im missing.

tt night went out with my buddies.
im so happy.
friends are never ending,
so dun ever forsake it.

i want back my life.
drinking anybody?

2009-04-04T09:15:00.002+08:00

i went to my colleagues house ytd. and it was full of hello kitty!!!
OMG! ALL EXPENSIVE STUFFS.
i love all of the hello kitty! haha.

Went to eat with my colleagues.
And i proceed to my friends gathering! so happy ! haha
I rarely get to gather back with these buddies. and i love them.
our 7 yrs buddies ship. omg they are great la. they are really there when you need
That's wad i define good friends are for.

Went home at 3plus. and reached home at 3plus.
and he was waiting outside the door. that quite touched me. =D he's waiting for me despite i could not be reached. I just expect to see him lying on bead and snore off when i reached home.

But however, had a great time really great time with them . we pub hop. shiok!
And of cause was quite drunk. as usual vomit. Hey 3 pple drank 7 jugs i think. and it had been 3 mths since i touch liquor stuff.

Im happy and i love my friends/buddies and darling.

2009-04-03T10:32:00.003+08:00

Love made two love and become stranger.
When you are bound to love , you are bound to commit and bound to be fake.

When you love you dare not be true.
What you feeling?
What you thinking?
What you want?
You start becoming to refrain yourself from telling all the truths.

You scare quarrels.
You scare hurt.
You scare the invitable fights.
The wars.
All these made a couple to drift.
APART.

When you really need someone to be there to listen to your woes,
Your Stories,
Your troubles ,
Whose the one?

Who will be the one lending their pair of ears?
Who will be the one sitting there quietly to understand the pain you are going through?
WHO?
The one you loved ?
Your friends?
Your family?
Your colleagues?
Your buddies?

Sometimes even your closed one would not trust you.
Not to say loved ones.
So what is the different between lovers and a couple deeply in love ?
OR
what is the different between lovers and friends?

Friends are more believing and trustful.
And thats why they are known as friends.

Weak i should say.
The weak become weaker.
Some people used to be strong and determined.
Because of some obstacles, they became weak.
And as time passed by , they become weaker.
Thats the logic. Cause you live in the world and used to it.
How could one walked out from it?
How could one be back stronger?

The mind is playing a fool of one.
When you wants things to be positive , it will but sometimes it will not.
But for the mind of a lady, Once they decided to set / fixed a decision ,
Thats the call.
FINAL SAY.
I believe nothing could do to change it.
That's woman.

I do not want to decide neither to set.
I do not want to do anything that i might regret.
I'll allow things to take its nature way.
If this isnt the way for me , heaven set it, I'll take it.
Im not letting heaven to decide but this time round i could not find my way out.
It seems ... LOST.
I want to. find it back. give me time.
Tell me the weak will get stronger.
I shall say.

I really miss my family.
Treasure the ones , your family, if you are seeing them everyday,
I just urgh to miss them. Im apart because i want to work to have the money.
Mummy trust me after probation , when i have alt sat , i will be back home acc you.
Love's not make me blind yet.
Cause i know i still have you.
Doesnt matter how much problems i met , i tell myself , i have my dearest family.
I know i just sound like foreigns.
But i can just feel that people who doesnt have their parent beside them , they are missing them. When they met problem or people mistreat them , the saddness within their heart.
Its hurting.
Perhaps this is HOME SICK.

是我想太多你总这样说
但你却没有真的心疼我
是我想太多我也这样说
这是唯一能安慰我的理由
我想我没有错怪了什么
虽然你不说或许错在我
太晚我才懂爱了你太多oh...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

2009-03-28T10:06:00.002+08:00

oh shit!
my eyes are closing.

im so tired.
I might be slping early tonight
but hard to say. Each time say slp early , then end up sleeping in the morning.
ahhhh im so tired RIGHT NOW!!
and i feel like shitting.

ahhhhh i need money money money.
many money !!

2009-03-24T13:03:00.004+08:00

I have a stupid idiot boyfriend .
and he's really stupid idiot.

haha

happy 7th mth being together.
Although its only 7th month being tgt , but all these 210days we had been together all the time and days. haha i love him.

my colleague on leave again.
GUess im going to be alone for the whole week.
this is boring.

AND THAT IDIOT ON THE FONE KEEP ON TELLING ME HE WANS TO GO HOME.
EEEEERRR.

--why everyone treat me like tt including you?
sucks. im sucks la.farking EMO now! i want to go home.

----------------------------------------------------------------

我知道这样不好也知道你的爱只能那么少
我只有不停的要要到你想逃
泪湿的枕头晒干就好
眼泪在你的心里只是无理取闹
以为在你身后是我一辈子的骄傲
原来你什么都不想要

我不要你的呵护你的玫瑰
只要你好好久久爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好贪心也好
哪个女人对爱不自私不奢望
我不要你的承诺不要你的永远
只要你真真切切爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好贪心也好
最怕你把沉默当做对我的回答

泪湿的枕头晒干就好
眼泪在你的心里只是无理取闹
以为在你身后是我一辈子的骄傲

原来你什么都不想要
我不要你的呵护你的玫瑰
只要你好好久久爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好贪心也好
哪个女人对爱不自私不奢望
我不要你的承诺不要你的永远
只要你真真切切爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好贪心也好

最怕你把沉默当做对我的回答
我不要你的承诺不要你的永远
只要你真真切切爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好贪心也好
最怕你把沉默当做对我的回答
原来你什么都不想要

2009-03-22T00:23:00.002+08:00

Alrights.

met up with MY precious brother.
He had fallen out of love. he was like so heart broken.
See him so lonely , feel so heart pain.
But anyway wads love?

love is like that isnt?
the more you give in, the more hurting it is.
other then sweet and romance , the ending of the story would be both sweet and bitter.

even if u cling on to it when theres no more feeling , theres no point , the relation between both parties will be resume back to the same anymore.
ITS CONTRADICTING.

THIS IS LOVE.

Heart pain to see him like tt. but anyway its a process where he certainly got to been through i cant say much neither i could help him. i believe wad i could do is to acc him when he needs pple to talk to. Either to make him feel better or occupied. Hope that life would be better for him in the future , with this girl coming in and out of his life , he'll grow up. and i believe.

CAUSE THIS IS OUR LIFE LEARNING PROCESS.

P.S and because of knowing that my brother fall out of love , my darling FIRST TIME talk non stop for 2.5 hours. THAT'S AMAZING! well , its his good intention also. and i appreciate. and he's not bad in pursuading la. i should say. NOT BAD. out of 100 sentences perhaps 20% of wad he say i agree. HAHA.

OH YAR~ I MISSED WILSON'S 21ST BDAY .
IM SO SORRY.
But hope he had a happy birthday ! and hope he enjoyed his bday =]
meet up soon eh all my poly buddies.
you guys are the best !

2009-03-15T15:50:00.001+08:00

本来我们的爱情浪漫又甜美
因为你的过去缠绕我的心扉
有时侯我的脆弱你不是能体会
又何苦你和我彼此都感觉太累
有时侯问自己是否为你哭了吗
还是我对你的感情爱的太深了
你割心的以前让我一次次的痛
甚至还有种种让我更伤心的话
不是我不爱你也没有原因
这份感情再继续会怕你更伤心
谢谢你关心我爱我体贴照顾我

2009-03-15T00:00:00.002+08:00

went for the burberry sales at conventional hall.
well. was not a good one.
cause im buying not using my own money.

and it was like ...

sometimes i feel so . haa bcorz of wad?
of stupid things. omg! i had got nth to say but so disheartened.
forget it.

mummy im coming back tml!!
i will hug u tight tight and i want to give u a kiss.
it has been so long since we see each other? other than on phone.

some times i believe family are the closest pple in the world who you should not take for granted.
i love them all. mummy ah boy as well as steven.

well. sometimes i know his intention.
the way he love and care me.
sometimes i felt like an idiot.
i cant say anything. its all about giving and taking.
i really want to go home right now!!
i dun like the way he treat me now!!
im sick and tired of these!!!

IM GOING TO SLEEP RIGHT NOW!
FARK!

2009-03-13T13:04:00.001+08:00

OMG!

MY COLLEAGUE HAS JUST SENT ME SALES INFORMATIONS.
LOL OMG!

THERES' BURBERRY SALES!!
HAHAHAHA.
MY BAG MY BAG MY BAG!
YEA!

I Know my darling will see this and i know he will sent me there .

ON TOP OF THAT THERE IS NEW HELLO KITTY MAC LAUNCH!!
ANOTHER SERIES! OMG!
HAHAHAHA.

I know my darling will see this and i know he will buy it for me.

LOL. OMG! I just cant wait to go !!!
TIME FLIES PLS!

2009-03-11T12:29:00.005+08:00

im so boredd.

so boring la!!!
help me!! lol

I HAVE BEEN DOING FILING AND FILING... =[

AHHH I WANNA DO INTERIOR SALES DESIGNS!
but a haven finish my probation. =(

AHHHH.
had my lunch. actually the lucnch , the auntie cook quite nice.
lol. i love all ths dishes she cook sia.
really nice leh.

haha
but one thing is im getting fatter la!
im 54 now . =(
and that stupid bf of mine keep asked me to eat eat eat cb!
but still i love him.
that silly idiot of mine can like just becorz sending me to work and causing him to be late for like continously late for work.
im so sorry but also thank you for alwsys be by my side. <3
hearts*

I MISS MUMMY.
and im gg home on sun after my driving lesson. haa.
TP IS ON 5/5 .
IM GOING TO PASS IT.
STOP WASTING MONEY.
AND I WILL! =P

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活
不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

眼泪她为你流过也为自己掉过
对于你们的爱她总是抱着坚强的笑容
错过那些时间谢谢她的守候
是时候紧紧牵她的手
带她到你的城堡裡
最近还好吗想念的心开不了口

枯想着妳有没有好好过
担心着妳每天生活
你好吗最近如何
照顾身体工作加油
我一个人也会勇敢好好过
不让你担心多一秒想念着
每天每秒我们故事
每天每秒说好的事

两个人一起散步是最浪漫的事
你就是我的天使
给我力量能够坚持
那些关心问候翅膀一样的双手
是我最幸福的所有

心裡面有你建的角落
脆弱时我能够躲一躲妳爱我
像翅膀一样温柔的手
我要抱着妳不要再错过
你的爱是最蓝那片天空
cuz baby girl I'm coming back home

幸福少了妳在身边不会完整
人潮中朝你走来那张可爱微笑的脸孔
这份爱不是悸动守护一辈子的感动
这段路踏着幸福的每一步一起牵着手
心疼妳会睡不好总是缩在床的一角
我要回来给妳依靠哄妳看妳笑着睡着
照片裡你的微笑我们甜蜜得打闹
好希望微风把思念代替我亲吻你嘴角
想念着每天每秒我们故事
每天每秒说好的事

2009-03-07T23:46:00.006+08:00

okay . my sister has got married. can see that she is filled with happiness.
and wish and hope she will be a happy mummy and wife.

pictures upload soon. its with jess!

went vivo and got my MAC hello kitty .
Shoonie told me there is only 2 branches that sell MAC kitty.
and it made me ruch down to buy
in case OUT OF STOCK.
I LOVE IT LA. GOT THEM AT $47 FOR 2 ITEM.

my nail lacquer and lipstick.

then i had my nails done -by myself lol.

and this is my office life.

bored when enough off filing and emailing.

my lunch

my desk

MY BORING FILING!

and i got a vaio laptop. i mean its ours. lol and i've got these random pictures.

this is my boyfriend. bcorz too ugly to show, so its like tt. haha

this is when a pirate caught him with illegal stuff.

and wants to kiss him.

then the lill bin bin.

this is my life for the past few days.

working east and slp and work.

tml driving resume.
I WANT TO CONQUER DRIVING PHOBIA!!!

2009-03-04T12:56:00.002+08:00

I AM SO TIRED!
I JUST FEEL LIKE SLEEPING NOW

OMG!
I CANNOT TA HAN LAR.
my eyes ... are... like ... lol!

ADMIN is also quite tiring .
is my new post.

tired tired and tired.

2009-02-25T18:00:00.004+08:00

26/2 we had SIT GRAD night @ marriot hotel.

It was not that interesting but still alrights.

all of us managed to get together for gatherings.

we had our buffet then we proceed to our dbo / obar party!

see how hungry is this guy. - thomas. my rp buddy

Not forgetting my sec sister - lesly tan

and yes the girls where i knew in RP. wanxian , shoonie and angie

all buddies i knew in year3. they made my RP yr3 interesting.

our sitting position during dinner.

thomas me wan xian and xiao bai

then to our clubbing night party!

cool.

we saw one amazing and interesting stuff.

social smoker smokes on tt day ! haa

dance dance. my best buddy - miss shoonie.

always look so gentle and demure

i love her.

and of course theres someone always takes the ugly side of us.

tts how we look like when we drink and dance in such a squeezy place

and oh yar. did i mention some one propose to me ?

hahaha. my stupid buddy , smoking khaki and talk rubbish khaki.

they always not forgetting to disturb me.

I had fun ytd night.

les joined us for the club. hope she enjoyed

and to all my buddies hope all of u enjoy ur day.

ienjoyed.

really! love you guys!

YOU all made my RP last yr interesting!

Muacks!

2009-02-25T18:00:00.001+08:00

sometimes i wish things would change to better.
although it does not concern others , but who would want pple always critisise the one you loved.

i just wishes for a better.

i talked to my brother ytd.
i realised i love him.
i love my mother.
i love my family.
blood is still thicker then water.

although everyone here likes me.
but i want all to like my the other partner.

he came home.
black face
attitude.
i dun want to think.
wad am i expected to do ?

2009-02-24T14:51:00.003+08:00

ytd was our 1/r yr being together.
And that idiot of mine remembered but im on the verge of forgetting.
what i should say ? i HAVE a good bf. who cares and who loves.
Happy 6mth anniversary. though all these days through out 6 mths , we are together , though there are ups and downs , but we overcome them isnt? =D

i must say , i love you , you love me , we are happy family!
with a big great hug and a kiss from me to you ,
i must tell you I LOVE YOU.
hahahaha. <3

oh yar! went interview ytd and i've got the job.
dun know whether to be happy or not.
its a perm job but still, im only 21 so i decided to work for experience first
instead of nuaing at home like tt.
really relaxing but boring.
so i decided to earn some income for ...

MACAU? TAIWAN again? THAILAND?
which ever we want to go first.

2009-02-23T14:41:00.001+08:00

alrights i think im so girly girly.

haha.

i've turned his room into a girly girly room.

and yes. that's it.

the picture i've drawn on his wall.

and his family are helping me collecting 7-11 hello kitty.

anyway wanna trade? look for me k ? i have several repeated =D

i love all!

i love everyone!

2009-02-22T02:11:00.002+08:00

Well just came back from movie @ kallang leisure park.
It has been so long since i went there , thinking back those times , been there with all my primary school mates , and times change , how many primary school mates can last forever?
I think i left with 1 or 2 best buddies in kong hwa? lol

Well , watch look for a star .
Hmmm , i should say , andy lau is so handsome! lols and it was a not bad show lar.
Sweet , romance , funny , and quite touching =)

Nowadays have been to serveral driving lesson.
i left 10-12 lesson to complete but i haven booked my tp.
The though of booking tp is so scary.
Having someone so stern and strict beside me was really scary.
But i was told that just pretend that person is your friend where you are to sent him to some destination. urrrgghh. scary. thats was why i haven booked my TP yet. haha .

Anyway tomorrow having one class room lesson.
mon and thur interviewing.
i so much wish to have the FEO job. rather then ADMIN -.-" it boring la.
but anyway thurs is my graduating night ! yea.
and tue result is out. happy or not all depend on that day.
And i was to be fined by 0.20 CENTS. and were to go back to school just to pay that 20 CENTS! ahhh ley chey. hopefully , shoonie able to pay for me. If not i had to travel ALL THE WAY BACK AND DOWN AGAIN .
I wan to thank my dearest buddy - miss shoonie. lol, for being so kind! =)

And i had a meet up with my darlings sister dee and les tt day.
was so happy so long lost buddies.

Anyway my dearest sister is getting married .
I am to give her all my blessing.
the first one among us to get married.
wish you have a blissful wedding.
i love you!

2009-02-16T00:40:00.003+08:00

well. i had a great valentine for like the first time in year.

Simple. yet touching and suprising.

I did spent valentine b4. but it will be just like... happy.

Yet this is the most suprising and touching one.

because he's my darling . =)

i thought there wouldnt be any celebrations.

Cause for the past few days he spent so much money on me.

Thus im not hoping to get any flowers neither presents.

But just him acc-ing me for a nice dinner.

That was onlymy initially thoughts.

BUT

He shown me a "sorry i really have nothing much to give it to you." face , idea.

Initially was dissapointed. AS I WANTED A DINNER!

Well , the later part was

so he planned everything in his car. and all the suprises was inside his car!
i've got flowers and my esprite watch!

He managed to give me suprises this time round!

Im really suprised. Despite all the times im with him , by right he wouldnt have time to plann anything. but he did it!

we had our pizza meal.

den for the dessert.

at night we proceed to NAN TIAN. with all his bro , bro gf , sis , sis husband.

to singk and drink. well. its all abt money starting again...

lucky won back the $300+ which we lost in the past 3 days.

AND IT WAS REALLY A GAMBLE .

he nearly lost 4k -.-"

WTF lar. but well , break even back. HENG!

anyway i love you darling <3

Anyway im going to be my dearest sis bridemaid!

OMG. my first time. and i got to wear the longgggg lonnngggg dress.

i hate this. yucks.

but still i got to give myblessing to my dearest sis.

i love you! wish you all the best! =D

2009-02-14T00:35:00.001+08:00

14/02/09

HAPPY VALENTINE TO ALL!
including all my dear buddies/friends/sisters!
May you all have a happy valentine and sweet ones. including the singles,may you all have a happy day with your dearest , and friends.

Lastly, a happy valentine to my, the sweetest one. MR LEE.
Yar , he peeked into my previous entry and told me it touched him.
and is PEEKED! idiot!

Anyway , i just want all to know he's the greatest one!
Life isnt tough yet not easy together with him.
quarrels are always up and down and always made our relation up and downs.
But still we are here strongly.

I ever asked myself whether will it be like the previous few relation.
But it always come to no conclusion. Thus telling myself things will takes its nature course.
and well , it will ...

once again thank you.
our `1st valentine.
I LOVE YOU MR LEE. <3

2009-02-12T16:55:00.004+08:00

Some times i must say im too unreasonable and irritating.
Well , i decided that im in the wrong and to forgive him.

Someone who
1. will smile and entertain me when im spouting nonsense to
2. pick and fetch me up and down
3. will rush back home after work just to scare that im lonely.
4. will accompany me all the times when i need to.
5. will buy hello kitty for me when he makes me angry
6. i've been together with for the past 150 days
7. bring me to shop when he knows i want to
8. doesnt mind that i spend how much of his money
9. will always text and remindme to eat
10. peel the scale of the prawn for me
11. knows that i need to sleep b4 him
12. misses me unconditionly
13. whom i can scold as vulgar as i like when im angry
14. kisses me whenever he's off to work

15. will wipe away my tears when i cry

16. Stay with me when im sad

17. understand me then noone else

18. play MJ with me

19. will secretly take a video/ picture of me
20. loves me unconditionally.

In conclusion, i love him. i shall let the matter rest and joanne will be a grown up stop being unreasonable! hees.
thank you darling!
and also
sorry my dear!